


Mixed Signals

by WindInYourSail



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Banter, Barba sticks his foot in his mouth, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Secret Relationship, Unplanned Pregnancy, and I’m tapped, this is why I never tag these things
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2019-06-06 07:55:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 41,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15190268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WindInYourSail/pseuds/WindInYourSail
Summary: Lydia Coleman arranged to complete an internship for her doctoral program with Manhattan SVU, volunteering her time as a victim advocate. She gets along great with the detectives, their snarky ADA is a different story. Though neither would admit it, they both kind of like the banter.





	1. Chapter 1

“Does he have to be such an ass?” Lydia Coleman huffed as she plopped to sit at her desk across from Rollins. “He just takes some time to warm up to.” Rollins replied with a smirk. “Believe me, when he wins this case you’ll appreciate him.” She added. “I doubt that.” Lydia said rolling her eyes. Benson had decided to take a chance on Lydia when she volunteered her services as a victim advocate. Lydia was attending Columbia working on her Doctorate in Psychology and needed an internship, not to mention case studies for her dissertation. Her past experiences had included being the director of a rape crisis center in Queens and the NYPD in that burrow had spoken highly of her involvement in previous cases. She had hit it off almost immediately with the detectives but the snarky ADA was another story.

“Lydia. I know you just got back but Barba’s asking if you can run another file over to his office.” Liv said as she walked out of her office. Lydia rolled her eyes and looked at Rollins. “He’s doing this on purpose.” Rollins bit back a chuckle as Lydia stood. “Is there anything else he could possibly want before he has me make a third trip?” Lydia asked as she took the file from Liv. “I’m not really sure he even needs this one.” Liv smiled. “I thought you guys were opposed to hazing?” Lydia huffed. “You make it too easy for him to push your buttons.” Carisi piped in from his desk. 

Lydia gestured to the door as she approached Carmens desk. “Can I just go in?” Carmen nodded knowing Barba had sent for her. “Is this everything?” She asked handing him the file, not quite over the argument they had had earlier about her coddling the victim. “Hi to you too Lydia.” He replied taking the file. She glared at him and pursed her lips to show she wasn’t amused. “I’m going to prep Amy tomorrow and I thought you might like to be there so I wasn’t... how did you put it... such an ass to her.” He said dryly. “What time?” Lydia replied. “Three.” Barba said pushing his bottom lip up and lifting his eyebrows as he looked at her over the file she had just brought him. “Meet in the courtroom or here?” She asked, ignoring the look he had given her often over the short month she had known him. The look that despite how much she despised him made her stomach do little flip flops. “Courtroom.” He said dismissively, returning to the file.

Barba spent the better part of three hours going over Amy’s testimony and prepping her for questions the defense might ask. “How you holding up?” Lydia asked as Amy sat next to her. “I’m just ready for this to be over.” Amy sighed. “You’re doing great, and win or lose facing him will help you process and move forward.” Barba gathered his things but listened as Lydia spoke with Amy. “How long does it take to move on.” Amy asked. Lydia exhaled. “That’s different for every person.” “Do you have an average? Or a timeline of stages I’ll go through. I like timelines.” Amy sighed. “Just the typical stages of grief. The only problem is you’ll go through them at your own pace and you may bounce back and forth between them.” Lydia said. “Yeah.” Amy sighed. “You’re good with them.” Barba said after Amy left, catching Lydia off guard. “What?” “Can I not compliment you?” Barba smirked. “Just didn’t expect it.” Lydia grumbled. 

The trial was long. The prosecution had rested and the defense was set to present their case the following day. “You could have called a character witness.” Lydia grumbled as she and the detectives entered Barba’s office. “It would have been redundant.” Barba replied dismissing her statement. Lydia rolled her eyes but didn’t say anything else. Barba noticed and added. “Don’t worry, I’ll find an opening on cross.” He smirked at Lydia. “You’re confidence is alarming.” She replied. “I thought confidence was supposed to be an attractive quality?” Barba teased. “Not when it borders on narcissistic.” She quipped back getting a chuckle out of Rollins. 

Barba did as promised and managed to get Stuart, the defendant, to show his true colors on cross. Lydia would never admit it to him but he was good. She would have held that against him too but it had resulted in a guilty verdict and she was happy for Amy. She was working on some paperwork when Liv sat a file on her desk. “What’s this?” She asked looking up at Liv. “Barba asked if you could bring that to him when you finish. No rush. He left his home address to take it to if it was after five thirty.” Liv replied. “Is that even appropriate?” Lydia whispered to Rollins after Liv went back in her office. “It’s Friday, even Barba deserves to leave early every now and then.” Rollins said glancing up from her work. 

With her paperwork finally finished Lydia glanced at the clock. “Six.” She sighed to herself, picking up the note with Barba’s home address. “Great. you found me.” Barba said, answering the door inviting her in before she could just hand him the file and leave. “Your place is nice.” She said as she entered. “Thanks.” He said taking the file from her and setting it on the kitchen island. She made her way to look out his floor to ceiling windows. “You have a great view.” “Yes I do.” He said. She didn’t notice he was staring at her. 

She turned to leave but he had made his way to stand next to her. “I should go.” She blushed. “You can stay for a drink if you like. I was just about to pour myself one.” He moved slightly closer to her as he passed her on his way to his bar cart. “You are old enough to drink?” He asked, giving her a smirk as he poured himself a scotch. “You know I’m twenty seven.” She replied, rolling her eyes. “You never told me how you are.” Barba said. “Yes but I know you’ve seen my resume. Your too type A to let an intern have anything to do with your cases unless you had thoroughly vetted them.” She pointed out. “Actually I thought you were thirty based off your graduation dates.” He was smiling with his eyes and she felt a small amount of satisfaction that she had been right.

“So... you want a drink?” He asked again. “One drink couldn’t hurt.” She replied. “What do you want?”He asked. “What do you have?” She replied. “Whiskey, vodka, gin, rum... honestly it’s pretty stocked.” He said. “Vodka soda.” She replied, rolling her eyes slightly causing him the smirk. “Do I really annoy you that much.” He asked handing her her drink. “I don’t know. How many times are you going to make me run back and forth between the precinct and your office next week.” Lydia said dryly. “There wouldn’t be much fun in it if I told you a head of time.” He was fighting back a smile. “You’re such an ass.” She said looking at him over her glass as she took a sip. 

“Your really twenty seven?” He asked handing her round two as he sat on the couch next to her. “Why do I look older?” She asked pretending to be offended. “Younger actually, I just... I mean... I just added four years to your undergrad graduation date and then eighteen to that.” She grinned as he stumbled over his words, having never seen him do so before. “Yeah, I skipped first grade, took concurrent and AP classes in high school so by the time I got to college I graduated in two in a half years having taken full loads each summer.” She said dismissively. “That takes dedication.” He said almost sounding impressed. “More to do with necessity. We didn’t have a lot growing up, so I saved every dime I earned for school. It was cheaper to pay for concurrent classes and AP exams than college courses. It’s also cheaper to cram as many classes into a semester as you can than to pay multiple semesters tuition.” She explained.

“What teenager saves for college? You must have been a nerd.” He smirked. “Like you have room to talk Mr. Harvard scholarship.” Lydia chuckled. “I really wish you were thirty.” He sighed. “What is your deal with thirty?” She asked finishing her second drink. “Nothing.” He replied getting them both a refill. “How old are you, Mr. Barba?” She asked, teasingly saying his name. She had stood and walked over to look out his window again. “Forty.” He replied standing next her as he handed her the drink. “I can’t get over your view.” She stated, gazing out the window. “Me either.” He sighed. She turned to face him. He was standing close. Probably too close to be appropriate but at the moment she didn’t mind. “Barba?” She said. “Yes.” He hummed and her stomach started with its damn flip flops again. “Were you looking at me just now?” She asked softly as he stepped even closer to her. “Maybe.” He smirked pulling her into him and pressing his lips to hers. 

She wrapped her arms around his neck returning the embrace briefly before pulling her lips from his. “You know I hate you right?” She said, slightly out of breath. “Sure you do.” He smirked. “God you’re an asshole.” She replied, smiling playfully as he pulled her to his lips again. Barba guided her backwards as they kissed toward his bedroom. Her fingers had his shirt unbutton before they reached his bed. She pushed his shirt off his shoulders, his suspenders too. He pulled her dress shirt off over her head before unfastening the front of her dress pants. Their lips barely parted as they removed each other’s clothing. He laid on top of her as his kisses moved down her neck, tonging a nipple as he made his way further down, teasing her inner thighs before eliciting a soft moan when he finally made contact with her most sensitive spot. She gripped his hair as he expertly made her squirm. He kept tonging her even after her back arched and she rather loudly signaled her release. He kissed up her body gently as he climb between her legs, his lips softly making contact with hers again.

She could feel him teasing her opening. “Barba...” She panted. “Yes.” He hummed between kisses on her neck, his hands roaming freely. “You have a condom?” She whispered the question, mostly because she was afraid his answer would be no and she hadn’t decided if it was deal breaker, despite the fact that it should be. He pulled to the side slightly, rummaging through his nightstand. Once he found what he was looking for he sat up between her legs and rolled the condom on. Her eyes widened slightly when she saw him. She assumed at least some of his confidence had to due with what hung between his legs. He didn’t allow her much time to over think before his lips were on hers again and she could feel him pushing into her. She moaned against his kiss as he slowly filled her, giving her a moment to adjust to him before he began moving in and out of her. Her moaning became louder as she approached climax again. He listened to her as he felt her arch up and tighten around him. Once he knew she was close to finishing he allowed his own release, grunting a few last thrust before collapsing on top of her, panting kisses on her neck. He disposed of the condom before crawling in bed beside her. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him. 

Lydia stirred around five am. She didn’t recognize where she was at first, then the previous nights events came back to her. “Shit.” She muttered to herself. She looked next to her and saw Barba sleeping soundly. She quietly snuck out of bed, grabbing her clothes on the way out of his room. She dressed in the living room, locking the little lock on the door knob as she snuck out his apartment. She kicked herself as she rode the subway home, trying to figure out when she became so stupid that she’d sleep with someone she worked with. Someone she hated. Then she smiled as she thought about the night she spent with Barba, wondering if there was anything he wasn’t good at, kicking herself again for not actually hating him.


	2. Chapter 2

“Morning Lydia.” Carisi said as she entered the bullpen Monday morning. “Morning.” She smiled as she sat at her desk. Barba rushed passed Lydia and the detectives on his way to Liv’s office. “What’s his rush?” Lydia asked, hoping that something was going on and not her worst case scenario gut reaction that Barba had only slept with her to get rid of her. She hated that she did that but her brain always thought the worst even if it was completely crazy. “We got a new case yesterday.” Carisi answered. “Why didn’t you guys call me?” Lydia asked, her fears worsening. “The victim didn’t make it.” Rollins sighed. “Oh.” Lydia said. “No point dragging you in for paperwork when you have school work.” Carisi said.

They were interrupted when Barba and Liv came out of her office. “We don’t have a victim so if I plan to prosecute I need a suspect and some actual evidence.” Barba said as they walked towards the detectives. “I know.” Liv sighed. “Morning Barba.” Carisi said. “Carisi, Rollins...” He pause briefly and looked at her causing her eyes to shift downward. “Lydia.” Rollins gave a curious look when Lydia meekly responded with. “Hi Barba.” The corner of Barba’s mouth twitched up slightly at her response before he turned to Liv. “When you get the file started have Lydia bring a copy to my office.” He said. “Rollins. Carisi. Get what you have to Lydia so she can start on the file. Fin should be back shortly with CSU’s report. Lydia, you can take it to Barba once you get that from Fin.” Liv said as Barba headed back to his office.

“So who saw who naked?” Rollins asked once they were both at their desk working again. “What?” Lydia said nearly choking on the sip of coffee she had just taken. “Last week you and Barba couldn’t see each other without berating the other verbally. Today he barely says your name and you’re all ‘hi Barba’.” She made her voice higher pitched as she imitated Lydia. “You’re crazy.” Lydia said, rolling her eyes as she stood to meet Fin who had just walked in. “That’s wasn’t a denial.” Rollins smirked. 

“Hey Fin. You have CSU’s report? I need it for the case file.” Lydia asked, ignoring the grin she could still see on Rollins face. “Yeah, here.” He said, handing her a stack of papers. “Thanks.” She replied. Rollins was still smiling when she got back so she grabbed the file off her desk and headed to Barba’s. He would complain that the CSU report was just thrown in but that was better than Rollins grinning at her from across the desk. Besides she was regretting leaving before he woke and needed to talk to him about what happened.

The first thing she noticed when she approached Barba’s office was that his blinds were drawn. She had never seen the floor length blinds closed. “You can go in.” Carmen said as she approached. She wanted to pause and take a breath before entering but felt Carmen would notice so instead she knocked softly and opened the door. Barba turned and walked towards her, not saying anything. He shut the door and took her hand, pulling her towards his desk. “Are we ok?” He asked. Lydia was surprised to see that he seemed genuinely concerned. “Yeah. I’m sorry I snuck out, I woke up at five and kind of panicked.” She smiled softly allowing him to relax slightly. “Do you regret what happened?” He asked, pulling her closer to him and tucking her hair gently behind her ear. “No.” She smiled. “Good. I was afraid I may have taken advantage.” He admitted. “I’m young, not naive. Besides if I had wanted you to stop I would have only had to ask.” She replied. “You seem pretty confident about that.” He smirked. “You’re a decent guy, you know aside from being a narcissistic ass.” She smiled.

“Can I take you on an actual date?” He asked. “Is that a good idea?” Lydia asked. “Oh... If you don’t want to...” He trailed off, the confidence she loved to hate faltering slightly. “That’s not what I said.” She replied, resting her hand on his arm. He smiled. “You’re only working with SVU temporarily, then you graduate and... well I don’t know what your plans are but I doubt its to continue working for free.” “That’s true. Do we tell anyone?” She asked. “Why don’t we see if there’s anything to tell first. You know aside from fantastic sex.” Barba smirked. “You’re referring to your own talents in the bedroom, aren’t you?” She replied, rolling her eyes. “You enjoyed yourself.” He smiled. “Whatever.” She said, playfully as she headed toward the door. “Oh and Lydia, you might want to cool it with the ‘hi Barba’ in front of the detectives or they’ll think somethings up.” He also made his voice higher pitched when he imitated her. She didn’t even turn to look at him as she flipped him off before opening the door to leave, shaking her head slightly when she heard him respond, “maybe later” before the door shut.

“Seriously, what was up with you earlier?” Rollins asked when Lydia returned to her desk. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Lydia replied. “Sure.” Rollins said, letting it go for the moment. The detectives hadn’t really gained much ground on finding a suspect but they had found a handful of Jane Does that fit the pattern. “You think this guys a serial?” Fin asked as Carisi added another girls morgue picture to the bulletin board. “All these girls were found by highways and had been raped before being strangled just like our latest victim.” Rollins said. They were piecing together their case but it left little for Lydia to do and Barba even less as they didn’t even have a suspect they might need a search warrant for. Lydia was watching them bounce ideas back and forth when her phone buzzed. She didn’t recognize the number but the text said, “You free tonight?” “Who is this?” She sent back. “Really? How many other men have you agreed to go out with?” Was the return text. “Not many.” She grinned after she pressed send. “Who you texting?” Rollins asked noticing her. “No one.” Lydia replied with an eye roll. It had been a while and she hadn’t got a response so she texted back. “I’m kidding Barba. I should be free.” Twenty minutes past before she got another text. “Sorry another ADA was in my office. Meet at my place or you want me to pick you up at yours?” She texted him her address adding, “What time do I need to be ready?” “Seven.” He replied,

When five o’clock hit Lydia made an excuse about a lot of school work so that she could leave without too many questions. The detectives had called it an early night too, deciding to start with fresh eyes in the morning. Her apartment was an efficiency but she loved the layout. There was a small kitchen in the corner with a counter overlooking her living room area. To the right of that was a door that led to her small but nicely updated bathroom. The bedroom area was up two steps from the living space. There was a door leading to her closet on the right side of her bed and large windows that lined one wall by her bedroom. The living was space large enough for her couch, coffee table, and television as well as a small desk and rather large bookshelf along the wall her front door was on. She had decorated it with mid century modern furniture, lots of browns and greens with a little pop of purple.

Lydia changed out of her dress shirt and slacks and put on at least eight different dresses before deciding on a simple blue shirt dress with three quarter sleeves and a high scoop neck. It hit her a few inches above her knee and although was loose, it had enough shape to still define her body. She dressed it up with a pair of nude heels and silver jewelry. Her hair actually still looked decent, especially since she like her curls looser. There was a buzz at her door just as she finished moving her things to a smaller purse that would look nice with her dress. “Hi.” She smiled, opening the door for Barba. “You look nice.” He smirked looking her up and down as he walked in. “I thought we were going out.” She said, watching him. “We are, I just wanted to see your place.” He replied. “And...” She smiled. “It fits you.” He said taking her hand in his. 

“Where are we going?” She asked as they exited her building. “Dinner.” He smirked. She gave him an annoyed look as he held the door for her. The restaurant he took her to was nicer than one she would have typically gone. “What are your plans after you finish school?” He asked once they had ordered. “I’m joining a practice that one of my professors recommended me for.” Lydia replied. “You’ll be a psychiatrist?” He asked. “That’s the plan. I enjoyed being a counselor while in grad school so it’ll be nice to do something I like and be paid decently.” She smiled. “Columbia has to be setting you back a bit.” He stated. “I received a scholarship for Colombia. That’s the only way I would even consider going back to school.” She said. “That’s always nice.” He smiled. “What about you? What are your goals, judge perhaps?” She asked. “You sound like my Abuelita,” he smirked, “that’s was she calls me, mi juez, my judge.” “You don’t want to be a judge?” Lydia smiled. “Perhaps later, but I think I’d miss the banter.” He replied causing Lydia to chuckle. “What?” He asked lifting an eyebrow. “I’m just imagining you having to sit quietly, remain impartial, and only speak when you had to make a ruling on something... I’m not sure you could do it.” She was grinning now. “I could but I’m not sure I’d want to.” He smirked. “Sure.” She replied lifting her eyebrows slightly.

Barba gently took her hand in his as they sat in the back of his town car. He was lightly running his fingers over her palm when she leaned over to kiss him. The kiss was heading from PG to NC17 pretty quickly as she moved to straddle him, his hands and mouth exploring her. “We need to stop for condoms if you plan on coming up.” She panted between kisses. “I brought some.” He pulled away long enough for her to see him smirk. “You were that sure you’d get lucky.” She rolled her eyes and stared to pull away. He pulled her back, looking in her eyes. “Hopeful, not sure.” He replied, his eyes soft as if to apologize for making her feel in anyway less than she deserved. Lydia hesitated slightly before pressing her lips back to his. Everything was happening fast considering she had hated him only a few days ago but she didn’t want to stop kissing him. She didn’t want his hands to stop touching her and she definitely wanted what would surely happen if her came up to her apartment. 

“You still want me to come up?” Barba asked when they pulled in front of her building. She didn’t say anything, just kissed him before dragging him by the hand out of the car behind her. Once inside she began taking his clothes off, stopping him each time he reached for the zipper on her dress. When he was down to his boxer briefs she dropped to her knees and pulled him free. He made a little noise before biting his lower lip as he watched her place him in her mouth. Looking up at him, she bobbed her head, taking him deeper. He reached his hand to the back of her head, entangling it in her hair. “Mierda.” He exclaimed as she took him down her throat holding him there for a moment before pulling off him completely to gasp for air. 

She was going to continue but he pulled her to him, pressing his lips firmly to hers as he walked her toward her bed. He spun her so her back was against him. Holding her firmly in place with his left arm, he reached his right hand into her underwear, kissing her neck as she began to moan. Once she was as wet as he wanted, he pushed her over the edge of her bed. “Don’t move.” He whispered in her ear. Her heart raced as she waited, listening as she heard him opening a box, glancing back to watch him put the condom on. He lifted her dress and pulled her underwear down but didn’t bother to remove them, thrusting in harder and faster than she had expected. “Fuck!” She gasped as he entered. “You ok?” He grunted without really stopping. She merely moaned her reply. He gripped her hair tightly, close to her scalp and pulled. Her moaning increased in volume and he felt her tighten around him, allowing himself release. 

“Restroom?” He panted, still leaning over her. “By the kitchen.” She replied. When he returned, Barba gently removed the remainder of her clothing and pulled her into her bed. “I wasn’t to rough was I?” He asked gently kissing her shoulder as they spooned. “I’m not complaining.” She smiled. He exhaled. “I got a little carried away.” She turned to face him. “Unless I actually tell to stop feel free to get as carried away as you want.” She smirked. “What time do you wake up in the morning?” He asked wrapping his arms around her. “Five.” She sighed. “That’ll give me time to get home and get ready myself.” He hummed. “You’re staying?” She asked. “Unless you don’t want me to.” He replied. “No I do.” She smiled. “At least I know you won’t be sneaking out on me tonight.” He smirked.


	3. Chapter 3

Lydia’s alarm went off and she groaned as she stretched her arm out to turn it off. In her half awake state she had forgotten Barba was there until she felt his arms wrap around her. “Why do you get up so early?” He grumbled pulling her tighter against him. “Because I have to be at work at eight and I like to do my hair and makeup.” She smiled turning to face him. “It takes you that long to get ready?” He smirked. “It takes me about forty five minutes by subway to get to work. Not everyone has a car service Barba.” She replied curling into him. “You know most women I’ve bent over a bed call me Rafael.” He suggested. “And how many women would that be?” She asked raising an eyebrow. “Not that many.” He smirked, pushing her hair behind her ear. “I’ll try, but I’m kind of accustomed to calling you Barba.” She yawned, closing her eyes for a moment as he held her.

“What is that?” Lydia mumbled as she was pulled from a dream. “Huh?” Barba muttered not fully awake himself. Lydia jerked awake realizing it was her phone ringing and they had fallen back asleep. “Hello?” She answered. “Yeah. No I’m fine. I just overslept. Yeah I’ll be in as soon as I can.” She hung up the phone and smacked Barba playfully as he laughed. “It’s not funny, jackass.” “It’s kind of funny.” He grinned. “Ok, you have to go so I can get ready.” Lydia said pushing him out of bed. “It’ll take at least twenty minutes for my car to get here.” He smirked at her as she hurriedly gather her things for the day. “Fine. Don’t leave until I’m out of the shower.” She said as she rushed pasted him with her clothes in her arms. “Why?” He called after her. “I want a kiss goodbye.” She said popping her head out of the door before disappearing into the bathroom again. Barba smiled and called for his car.

“You stay up too late working on school work?” Carisi asked when Lydia finally got to the precinct at nine. Barba had dropped her off a block away on his way to his own house to change, saving her almost an half hour on her commute. “She stayed up late doing something.” Rollins smirked. “Yes, lots of school work.” Lydia replied giving Rollins a looks of annoyance. “All I’m saying is you seemed very happy texting on your phone yesterday.” Rollins smiled. Lydia decided to ignore the latest comment, just thankful that she didn’t mention Barba. “Lydia. Rollins. There’s a victim at Bellevue.” Liv instructed as she exited her office. “The victims alive?” Rollins asked. “This is a new case. We’ll have to put the serial aside until we get more evidence. Our living victim takes priority.” Liv said. “What about us?” Carisi asked gesturing to him and Fin. “Once we get more information I’ll give you an assignment.” Liv replied.

Lydia was smiling as she gazed out the window while Rollins drove them to the hospital. “I was only teasing about Barba yesterday but you are seeing someone.” Rollins said, noticing. “What makes you say that?” Lydia asked, turning to look at Rollins. “Well for starters you can’t stop smiling and yesterday you had that same smile while texting someone.” Rollins stated. “Can’t I just be happy.” Lydia smirked. “No.” Rollins teased. Lydia shook her head and chuckled.

“Hi Victoria.” Lydia said as they entered the hospital room. “Tori, please.” She replied. “Ok, Tori. I’m Lydia. I’ll be your advocate during this process. This is Detective Rollins. She’ll take your statement, Ok?” Lydia said. Tori nodded. “You wanna walk me through what happened?” Rollins asked. Tori told them about meeting with a guy from her class to work on a project they had been assigned to be partners on. He had suggested her dorm room and she regretted agreeing almost the moment he had arrived. “You want to do a rape kit?” Lydia asked. “Do I need too?” Tori replied. “Did he use a condom?” Rollins asked. Tori shook head head with tears in her eyes. “Honey, you need to get tested.” Rollins stated. Tori turned to Lydia clearly shaken. “What Detective Rollins is trying to say is that a rape kit will test for STD’s, just to be on the safe side, as well as serve as evidence if you choose to pursue charges. It’s your choice but it’s mainly there for your protection.” Lydia said softly. “Ok.” Tori nodded.

Carisi and Fin were arresting the suspect, Chad Wellington, while Lydia watched Rollins and Liv go over the evidence they had. “What are we looking at?” Barba asked giving Lydia a subtle smirk as he approached. “Acquaintance rape.” Rollins replied. “Great another he said, she said.” He huffed. “Sorry they can’t all be gift wrapped for you.” Lydia quipped. There was a slight twinkle in his eye as he glared at her. He was about to return her jab when Carisi and Fin came in with Chad. “What’d you say his last name was?” Barba asked as Fin took Chad to interrogation. “Wellington. Why?” Rollins asked. “The son of Jack Wellington?” Barba asked. “Don’t know.” Rollins replied. “Find out. This case just got a lot more complicated if he is.” Barba sighed. 

“That bitch basically threw herself at me and now she’s crying rape?” Chad Wellington said as Liv and Barba watched Carisi question him. “I know, women right? Why don’t you tell me your side and we can try to clear this up.” Carisi replied. “I went over to her dorm room to work on this project we had been assigned. I’m there for maybe five minutes when she starts running her hand up my leg.” He said. “She came on to you?” Carisi clarified. “Yeah. I mean she’s hot so I thought why not, you know?” Chad replied. “So whose idea was it to go to her dorm?” Carisi asked. “Hers.” Chad stated. “So your text or emails will confirm that?” Carisi questioned. “Well I may have suggested her place but only because I live in a frat house. It’s not exactly conducive to studying.” Chad back tracked. “What was wrong with the library?” Carisi asked. “Too many distractions.” Chad replied. “You wanted to be alone with her?” Carisi asked. “I want my lawyer.” Chad replied. Carisi started to ask another question but Liv tapped on the glass signaling he was done.

“That guys slime.” Carisi said as he plopped in a chair next to Lydia. “Slime or not he lawyered up.” Liv replied. “And daddy will probably pay for a damn good one too.” Barba huffed. “I’m glad you think so.” Rita Calhoun said as she entered the bullpen. “Great.” Barba sighed. “Where’s my client?” Rita asked. “That was quick.” Fin stated as Carisi took Rita to Chad. “He must have called daddy when he saw you coming.” Rollins replied to Fin. “Let me see the evidence from Tori’s rape kit.” Barba grumbled. “The bruising supports her statement.” Lydia suggested standing close to Barba as she pointed at the pictures in the case file he was holding. “I’m not sure that will be enough. Is she believable?” He asked. “Why is that always your concern?” Lydia huffed. “It’s a fair question. Like it or not she’s the one who’ll be on trial here.” Barba snapped back. “As fair as that is.” Lydia muttered under her breath from the chair she had returned to.

Later that afternoon, Liv handed Lydia a small stack of papers. “Can you run this to Barba? It’s the email and phone records he got us a warrant for.” “Sure.” Lydia replied, taking the papers from Liv. “Hi Carmen.” She said as she approached his office, noticing his blinds were closed again. “I’ll let him know you’re here.” Carmen said before knocking on Barba’s door. “You can go in.” She said moving aside to allow Lydia to pass and closing the door behind her. Barba was sitting at his desk, forcing her to go to him. “Thanks.” He said dismissively, taking the papers from her. “Are you made at me?” Lydia asked furrowing her brow. “You were a little harsh earlier.” He replied. “No more so than normal, and wasn’t it you who said I needed to cut it with the ‘hi Barba’ around the detectives?” She snapped.

He stood and moved closer to her. “I guess you’re right.” He sighed. “I can’t believe a little bit of banter got you so worked up.” Lydia smirked causing Barba to lift an eyebrow. “I’ll show you worked up.” He whispered, pulling her against him pressing his lips to hers. He spun her around so that her back was against him, allowing his hands an opportunity to roam. He kissed her neck as he touched her. She whimpered as his hands would get close to her breast but never quite make the contact she wanted. He slowly moved his hands under the skirt of her dress, ever so lightly grazing her over her underwear. He pressed his lips against hers again when she moaned softly and he felt her panties dampen. She reached behind her to touch him but he stopped her. “Later.” He whispered pulling the hand that had been teasing her away. “Really?” She panted. “You are entirely too loud to do anything with in my office... at least while other people are here.” He smirked. “I can be quiet.” She almost begged. “I doubt that.” His smirk growing larger as he moved back to his desk. “You’ll pay for this later.” She threatened. “I’m counting on it.” He grinned, watching her compose herself to leave.

Lydia fumed as she made her way back to the precinct. “You look flushed?” Rollins noted when Lydia sat at her desk. “He’s just... just... frustrating.” She seethed. “I guess you really were doing school work last night cause you need to get laid.” Rollins chuckled. Lydia rolled her eyes not wanting to admit how correct Rollins had been, at least about the second part. The detective were working on the case but not there wasn’t much else for Lydia to do until they brought Tori back in for follow up questions which that wouldn’t happen until tomorrow. Lydia had started to work on some school work for her class that evening when her phone buzzed. “I’ll make it up to you tonight. Your place or mine?” “I knew it!” Rollins exclaimed, seeing the text on Lydia’s phone as she walked by. “Knew what?” Lydia replied grabbing her phone. “Whose JA?” Rollins asked. Lydia knew she hadn’t put Barba in her phone under his name for a good reason. She felt RB would be too obvious so she had put him in as Jack Ass and was thankful that only the initials had popped up fearing that jackass might be obvious too. “Just a guy.” She replied. “Yeah, ok. Have fun tonight.” Rollins grinned. Lydia ignored her as she returned Barba’s text. “I have class tonight until eight thirty, so I’ll meet you after at your place.”

The class that she normally loved seemed long and tedious as she watched the clock click by. The professor kept them an extra ten minutes and then pulled her aside after class. “How’s your dissertation coming?” He asked, knowing she would be defending it next semester. “It’s slowly coming together. I’ve got my basic outline, so I’m now writing different sections as they come to me. I’m making good progress though.” Lydia replied. “Let me know if you want me to read any of it for feedback.” Her professor offered. “Thanks. “I’ll get it organize and send you what I have later this week.” Lydia smiled.

It was nine thirty when she knocked on Barba’s door. “Hi.” He smirked as she pushed her lips to his barely giving him time to shut the door. He calmly unzipped her dress allowing it to drop to the floor as she frantically removed his clothes. She had him down to his underwear when he pushed her back on his bed and climbed on top of her. As his kisses moved to her neck he reached behind to unhook her bra, removing it moments before his tongue found her nipple. He took his time, suckling each breast before he moved lower. He gently removed her underwear, tonguing between her legs. She moaned as he made contact where she had wanted him to since his office earlier. He was less gentle when he rammed two fingers inside her, curling them just to feel her squirm. She came hard and quick but he wasted little time before he flipped her over and entered her from behind as she laid on her stomach. her legs pushed together by his as he straddled her.

Her moans were muffle by the mattress as he thrust into her. After a while, he laid on her back as he reached under her so he could roll them on their sides. I kept pumping into her from their spooning position, his left hand fondling a breast while his right found her clit. He kissed her when he felt her tighten, ignoring her hand as she tried to remove his hand fingers from her. She broke the kiss as she buckled into a second orgasm, pushing him deeper inside her, initiating his own release. He pump a few more times before pulling her against him as tightly as he could. He was still throbbing inside her as they both laid there catching their breath. 

“Better.” He panted. “Almost.” She smirked, kissing down his chest. “I may need a few minutes.” He breathed. “That’s fine.” She smiled, glancing up at him before placing him in her mouth. It didn’t take long before he was ready again. “Is this payback?” He smirked as she straddled him, lowering herself gently on him. “If that’s how you want to think of it.” She panted as she started to ride him, gasping when his thumb found her. Her lips met his when she collapsed in her third orgasm. He grabbed her ass, thrusting to finish himself. “You want more?” He asked, smirking when she could barely mumbled. “I’m good.”

They had cuddled for a while, kissing softly, when she started to get out of bed. “Where are you going?” He asked curiously. “I’m going home.” She smiled. “You should stay.” He pleaded pulling her back to bed. “I’m not running the risk of oversleeping tomorrow.” She smirked. “I’ll stay the night this weekend.” She added, kissing him. “Fine.” He pouted. He watched her get dressed before putting his boxer briefs back on and walking with her to the living room. “If I promise not to let you fall back asleep can I sleepover tomorrow?” He was grinning and she resisted the urge to smack him.


	4. Chapter 4

“What do you mean there isn’t enough evidence to pursue charges?” Tori asked as she sat in Barba’s office with Rollins and Lydia. “At the moment there isn’t enough evidence. His defense attorney is going to fight hard to make you out to be the type of person that would make their case. It wont be fair and it wont be easy. If we do this we unfortunately need more than your word.” Barba said. “But you said it would help to face him.” She said turning to Lydia. “I know, and it will help you heal, but so will the fact that you started the process.” Lydia replied. “So, it’s over? We just go back to having bio together?” Tori had tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Tori. We’re working on finding another victim or anything to help with your case. We haven’t given up.” Rollins assured her.

Tori had left but Rollins and Lydia were still in Barba’s office. “So what now?” Lydia asked. “Nothing.” Barba replied. “Nothing, really?” Lydia scoffed. “Not unless the detectives can find another victim or something that supports Tori’s claim.” He said, adding, “Do you really want her dragged through the hell Calhoun will put her through for nothing.” Lydia was about to snap back but as she looked at Barba she realized that in his own way he was trying to protect Tori. “Fine.” She muttered. “You two need a room?” Rollins teased with her brows raised. Barba gave Rollins an unamused look as Lydia pushed her out of his office.

“Can’t you tap his phone or subpoena his friends phone records or email? He’s had to have done this before and he seems like the type to brag.” Lydia questioned as Rollins drove them back to the precinct. “You’d have to ask your boyfriend, but that’s not really how it works.” Rollins chuckled. “Who?” Lydia asked genuinely confused at Rollins statement. “Never mind, I was still teasing about Barba.” She replied dismissively. “What about those fraternity chat sites? Those are public. Have you looked through those?” Lydia asked, changing the subject back to the case. “Fraternity chat sites?” Rollins asked lifting an eyebrow. “I’m still in school. I hear things.” Lydia replied. “I’ll see what I can find.” Rollins said.

Rollins had decided Lydia’s suggestion was worth looking into. She had been searching for the majority of the afternoon while Lydia worked on school work. “What are you doing here?” Lydia asked as Barba entered the bullpen. “Nice to see you too.” He smirked. “Oh good, Barba, you’re here.” Rollins said coming out of the conference room. Barba lifted his eyebrows, almost making a “ha” face at Lydia as he followed Rollins. “You should come too Lydia.” Rollins said as she headed to the conference room.

Rollins pulled a few internet sites up on the monitor as Liv, Fin, Carisi, Barba, and Lydia watched. “I went with Lydia’s idea about these fraternity chat sites and it led me down this very deep and twisted path.” Rollins said. “How so?” Barba asked. “Well see, at first its just a bunch of guy talk from different frat members, their pictures and names prominent. But then, if you read through these you’ll start to notice some of the text is different.” Rollins continued. “They’re hyperlinks?” Carisi questioned. “Yeah, and if you click through enough of them you get to this bang board site.” Rollins explained. “Bang board?” Fin asked, lifting an eyebrow. “It is was it sounds like, a site they list their conquest.” “Ok, so far all I see is a disgusting display of fraternities at their finest but nothing illegal.” Barba added, causing Lydia to bite her lip to suppress a smile. “Yes but the bang board has sub categories, one of which is...” She pulled up a page titled forcibly fucked but didn’t read it out loud. “They really like their alliterations.” Carisi quipped. “Can we tie Chad Wellington to this?” Barba asked. “I can. Tori’s picture appeared under a pseudonym I can trace back to him the day she went to the hospital.” Rollins replied.

Barba had Chad arraigned before the end of the day. Of course, Calhoun got him out on bail. Lydia had called Tori before she left for school telling her she’d meet her at Barba’s office the next day at three to talk about the trial. Her phone buzzed as the walked to class with a text from Barba. “You get out at eight thirty?” “I do.” She replied. “What building are you in and I’ll pick you up.” He offered. She smiled as she texted back. “Kent. It’s on the corner of College Walk and Amsterdam Ave.”

Her class had actually let out on time for a change. “Professor Thomas?” She called as he gathered his things. “Hattie. Hi.” He replied. “I just wanted to make sure you got my email with what I have so far for my dissertation.” She said. “I did. I’ve even opened it. You have more written than I expected.” He admitted. “I didn’t expect feedback yet, I just wanted to make sure you had received it.” She smiled. “I’ll have some time to look it over this weekend, next at the latest. I’ll mark it up and send it back to you.” He assured her. “I really appreciate it.” She said.

When she stepped outside she saw Barba’s town car waiting for her. “Did you have trouble finding it?” She asked as she climbed in. “Nope.” He said pulling her to him to kiss. She didn’t resist, merely collapsed against him as he pulled her onto his lap. Their hands and lips continuously moving over the other. “Barba?” She cooed between kissed. “Yes.” He hummed. “Why did you wish I was thirty?” She asked causing him to pause his kisses on her neck. “What?” She questioned pulling back to look at him. “It’s nothing that matters now.” He said dismissively starting to kiss her neck again. “Barba...” She pleaded teasingly. “Fine.” He sighed, looking slightly hesitant as she sat straddling him in the backseat. “When I turned forty, I...” “Uh huh.” She interrupted mostly to annoy him. “...I decided that I wouldn’t date anyone under thirty.” He revealed. “That lasted a while.” She said sarcastically. “That’s why I said it didn’t matter anymore.” He smirked pulling her back to his lips.

He pushed her against her door once they were inside her apartment, moving his hands to unbutton her slacks. She reached her arm to grab a condom out of the box he had left on her book shelf the other night and pressed it against his chest. “We’re using this tonight.” She stated as she walked him backwards toward her bed. Their clothes were scattered across her small apartment by the time she pushed him onto her bed. Crawling on top of him she began to take him in her mouth. “Turn this way.” He said pulling her so that he could pleasure her as well. She was bobbing on him as he tongued her. Gently he rolled them so that she was beneath him, pumping in her mouth as he made her moan, enjoying the vibrations they made. When she was getting close he moved to lie between her legs so that he could focus more on her. She gripped his hair with one hand and the sheets with the other as her back arched, moaning her release.

He sat up to put the condom on giving her a moment to breath before climbing on top of her. His lips pressed against hers as he buried himself inside her. His hands firmly yet gently gliding over her skin, pinching her nipples, his lips moving from her neck and shoulders to her mouth. “Barba?” She panted. “Yeah.” He replied, his breathing labored. “Can you pull my hair?” She panted. He smirked as her flipped her over. Sliding in from behind, he reached his left hand into her hair close to the scalp and pulled hard enough to lift her head. With his right he reached around to find her clit. She moaned loudly when she came, pushing against him. He had a strong hold on her and didn’t stop when she finish causing her to make almost inaudible sounds. “Bar...” She started but couldn’t finish as another orgasm erupted through her causing her to buck against him. He grunted a few more thrust as he came before collapsing on the bed next to her. “My god.” She panted as she laid, spent, next to him. “You’re welcome.” He managed to smirk briefly despite his heavy breathing. She tried to move closer to him but her legs wouldn’t stop shaking.

“You recover for a moment while I get rid of this condom, then we can cuddle.” He said, pulling himself to kiss her forehead. “Ok.” She nodded. When he returned from the bathroom she hadn’t moved from the position he had left her in. “Are they still shaky?” He asked not hiding the fact that he was proud of himself. “Just help me under the covers, jackass.” She giggled as she clumsily attempted to make her legs work. He helped pull the covers back while she managed to plop her head on a pillow. “Barba?” She said, once she was laying in his arms. “Yes.” He hummed. “What are we doing?” She asked. “I think it’s a little late for me to explain the birds and bees to you.” He joked. “You know what I mean.” She said, playfully smacking him on the arm. “I assumed we were dating.” He replied. “Yes, but are we having fun dating where what we just did is all we do, or are we dating dating where if someone else were to ask you out you’d say no?” She questioned. “I’m leaning more toward the latter.” He hummed. “So you’re not seeing anyone else?” She asked. “No.” He replied. “Ok.” She nodded against his chest. “Are you seeing someone else?” He asked. “Nope.” She smiled.

“Get up.” Barba groaned as Lydia hit snooze for the fourth time. “Just five more minutes.” She mumbled. “No. You need to get up. If I let you oversleep you’ll never let me sleep over on a school night again.” He teased, pulling the covers off her. “Yes I will.” She said, using a pillow to block the light he had flipped on. She couldn’t see the devilish grin on his face as she laid completely exposed to him with only the pillow covering her head. “What are you doing?” She questioned when she felt the bed shift and him crawl between her legs. “Waking you up.” He replied. She gasped when she felt his tongue flick unexpectedly on her clit. “That’ll take longer than five minutes.” She breathed as he continued to flick his tongue teasingly. He intensified his touch as if trying to prove her wrong, probing her with his fingers. After removing the pillow from her face she glance down only to met with his eyes. She was trying not to give him the satisfaction of knowing how quickly he was getting to her but she could no longer hold back her moans. Her body shuddered as she came. He gave her few extra licks just to watch her twitch before kissing up her stomach and chest as he made his way to lay next to her. “You were saying...” He smirked as her snooze went off again.

Barba had spent the better part of the day at the precinct going over the evidence they had on Chad Wellington. Lydia listened so she would be able to help Tori make sense of things later that afternoon. They were all going in and out of the conference room table having brought in a late lunch, when Carisi sat down in the chair next to Lydia. Everyone was busy doing their own thing when he quietly asked. “Hey Lydia are you seeing anyone?” Barba, who was sitting across the table from her, shifted his eyes their direction. “I am.” She replied not noticing they had garnered Barba’s attention. “You are what?” Rollins asked, having just walked behind them on her way back to her seat. “Seeing someone.” Carisi answered for her. “Oh yeah, that JA guy.” Rollins replied. “JA?” Barba questioned, lifting an eyebrow. Lydia opened her mouth to speak but Rollins beat her to it. “All I saw was a text that implied something naughty would be happening later and the initials JA. She wouldn’t tell me anymore than that.” “So What’s this guys name?” Carisi asked. “Yeah we really should make sure he checks out.” Fin smirked. Lydia rolled her eyes and looked at Barba. “Shouldn’t we be getting to your office to meet with Tori?” She suggested. “Yes.” He said coldly, glancing at the clock.

“I thought you said you weren’t seeing anyone else.” He snapped once they were a block from the precinct. “I’m not.” She replied. “Then whose this JA person?” He asked glaring at her. She chuckled slightly and pulled out her phone. “What you’re not going to answer me?” He barked. “Just a second.” She smiled flipping through her contacts. “What?” He snapped when she handed the phone to him. “Just look.” She smirked. He glanced at the contact named Jack Ass noticing his number. “You have me in your phone as jackass?” He asked, calmer now. “Well with Rollins being as nosy as she is I couldn’t exactly have you in as Barba. RB would have been obvious too as much as she already thinks there’s something between us. This actually worked out pretty well, aside from this incident.” She replied. “You don’t have anyone else in your phone under jackass do you?” He grumbled. “Are you jealous Barba? I promise you’re the only person I affectionately call jackass.” She smiled, taking his hand in her, at least until they were closer to his office.


	5. Chapter 5

Barba had a lot of work to do since the trial was starting on Wednesday so he had spent the majority of the weekend at his office. They had met for dinner Saturday evening but Barba had returned to work shortly after. Lydia had been slacking a bit on school work so she used the extra time to play catch up. It was around five thirty on Sunday when she finally got herself to a point she felt comfortable stopping, deciding she would surprise Barba with dinner. She had been lounging in pajamas all day as she worked so she went to her closet to change, putting on a gray skirt and black fitted shirt that left an inch or so of exposed skin between it and the top of her skirt. It was early October and starting to get chilly in the evenings so she put on an olive peacoat that came down almost to her knees. She stopped at the deli they brought in food from occasionally at the precinct and picked up sandwiches for both her and Barba, knowing what he typically ate from there.

“This is a pleasant surprise.” Barba said opening his office door. “I thought you might be hungry.” Lydia smiled holding up the bag of food as she entered his office. “Starved actually. I haven’t had anything but coffee all day.” He replied, clearing a space at his round table to eat. “You’re not cold?” He smirked as she laid her coat over the back of a chair. “That’s why I wore a coat.” She replied. “I must’ve done something really good in a past life...” He spoke, trailing off as he pulled her into his arms, running his fingers under the bottom of her shirt. “I doubt that.” She smiled giving him a short kiss before pulling him to the table with food. “Now eat.” She said forcing him to sit.

“So is the outfit payback for what I did to you in my office last week?” He asked raising an eyebrow as he finished eating. “No,” she smiled, rummaging for something in her coat pocket, “but I was thinking you could use a little stress relief.” She chuckled at the face he made as she held a condom up between her fingers. “Unless you think I’ll be too loud.” She added as he stood to lock his door. “Desk now.” He demanded, a smirk threatening. “But Mr. Barba, are you sure you can get my ticket dismissed?” She giggled as he walked her to his desk faster than she was moving on her own.

He sat her on the edge facing his chair and kissed her, his hands on her thighs as they began to reach up her skirt. She stopped his hands and pushed him back slightly so she could hop off the desk. “I’m her for you.” She whispered in his ear, reaching her hands between them to unbutton his pants. He moaned softly when she took him in her mouth. He gripped the back of her head when she looked up at him, taking him deeper. She let him control his depth for a few thrust before she relaxed her throat allowing all of him in, holding him there for a moment. She felt him tense slightly before he pulled out not wanting to finish yet.

He pulled her back to her feet and sat her on his desk again, kissing her as he stood between her legs. One of his hands grazed over her chest and he realized she wasn’t wearing a bra. The other made its way under her skirt. “Really? You were so sure this would happen you didn’t bother to wear any underwear?” He smirked, pushing her to lie back on his desk as she smiled at him. Sitting at his desk chair he teased her with his tongue and fingers. She tried to moan quietly, mostly to prove to him that she could. He waited until he felt her buckle before taking the condom off the desk and pushing himself into her. She pulled herself to sit and wrapped her legs around him biting his shoulder to stifle her moans. He grunted as he finished, panting slightly as he stood, mostly leaning on her now. 

“I’ll give you a ride home.” He said, beginning to gather his things. “You don’t have more work?” She asked. “I do, but it can wait until tomorrow.” He assured her. “Are you sure? I don’t want you to not get something done because of me. I really came just to give you a break.” She replied. “Then you should have worn underwear, there’s no way I’m letting you go home on the subway, alone, in what I know you’re... well, not wearing.” He smirked. “Fine.” She smiled, putting her arms around him. “You want to grab an overnight bag? Sleep at my place tonight?” He asked before kissing her. “I would.” She smiled.

The next week flew by. Barba had spent each night prepping for trial and Lydia had been in class, both too tired to do much else but sleep when they crashed in their respective beds. The trial started as planned on Wednesday but the defense kept delaying things so the trial would be resuming on Monday. This left Barba with another weekend of trial prep. Lydia had a presentation due on Thursday so she spent the better part of the weekend at the library doing research of her own. They had met for dinner on Friday and gone to her place after but both fell asleep almost immediately from exhaustion.

“How long is the jury going to deliberate for?” Rollins asked, rhetorically, as they sat around the precinct waiting. The closing arguments had been read on Tuesday and it was now Thursday afternoon. Lydia was trying not to think about the presentation she had that evening that had her more nervous than she’d like. She was beginning to feel a little queasy when Barba’s phone buzzed. “Juries back.” He announced. The distraction of court had suspended her nerves for the time being. They sat behind Barba as the verdict was read. Tori squeezed Lydia’s hand when a guilty verdict was announced. After saying goodbye to Tori, Lydia and the detectives waited in the hall to congratulate Barba. “Celebratory Drinks?” Carisi asked. “I’m in.” Rollins said. Liv and Fin nodded. “Sure.” Barba replied. “Alright.” Lydia agreed. 

She ordered a water, not wanting to drink before her presentation later. “Water?” Rollins asked, lifting an eyebrow. “I have to give basically a twenty minute mini lecture tonight because my professor has decided he no longer wants to teach but to have us teach each other instead.” She complained. Truthfully she had enjoyed the assignment it was just that she hated public speaking. “You’ll do great.” Barba assured her, seeming to have forgotten they weren’t alone. “That’s easy for you to say, you speak in front of people for a living.” Lydia sighed, starting to feel queasy again. “You do look a little green.” Carisi stated. “Thanks.” Lydia huffed. “Maybe a drink would calm your nerves.” Fin suggested. “Yeah, or help my stomach spill onto the floor. I think I’ll take my chances as I am.” Lydia replied.

They had been sitting around chatting for a while when Barba glanced at his watch. “Lydia, doesn’t your class start at seven?” He asked, this time garnering curious looks from the detectives. “Shit. I have to go.” She said, she had an hour but still had to grab her bag from her desk back at the precinct. “You know what time her class starts?” Liv asked turning to Barba. “She’s mentioned it enough.” He said dismissively. “Sure.” Rollins smirked.

Lydia had managed to make it through her presentation but her nerves still hadn’t settled. When she exited the building she saw Barba leaning against a car. She smiled and walked over to him. “I thought I’d pick you up.” He smiled pulling her in for a hug. “You know, you can be kind of sweet.” She smiled wrapping her arms around him. “How’d your presentation go?” He asked once they were in the car. “I think it went well actually. I still feel a little off though.” She sighed leaning against him. “You feel like this every time you have to give a speech?” He asked. “More often than not. Usually I’m back to normal after it over though.” She said. “Have you eaten?” He asked. “Not since lunch.” She replied realizing her stomach was growling. “Let’s get soup and take it to your place. We can just cuddle tonight.” He smirked.


	6. Chapter 6

“Carisi go with Lydia to the hospital we have a victim that matches the motive of that serial we were looking at before Tori’s case.” Liv ordered. “She’s alive?” Lydia asked. “She is.” Liv nodded. Rollins and Fin were already investigating the area off the highway where the victim had been ‘dumped’. “Hi Jena. I’m Lydia I’ll be your advocate during this process and this is Detective Carisi he’s going to ask you a few questions, ok?” Lydia said as they entered the room. Jena nodded. “Can you tell me anything about the man who did this to you?” Carisi asked. “He was tall and thin. Dark brown hair with a kind of scruffy beard. He told me to call him Jason. I’d recognize him if I saw him again.” She stammered. “Ok. Can you tell me what happened?” Carisi asked. “I was waiting for the bus. It’s were I always wait after my shift at the diner. This guy, Jason, came up, covered my mouth, and dragged me to a van. I tried to scream but he was too strong. He tied me to a bar in the back of the van and drove somewhere, I’m not sure where. He...” she paused and took a breath before continuing, “He raped me and then tried to strangle me. I went limp and held my breath hoping he’d think I was dead. I guess it worked because he started to drive again, stopping only to shove me out.” 

Jena had divulged that, though now twenty, she had been a runaway and that she doubted anyone would have looked for her. When they returned Carisi started looking through pictures of runaways, seeing if any matched the Jane Does they had found a few weeks back. “How does the victim seem?” Liv asked Lydia. “She’s scared but strong. She’ll made a good witness if we can find this guy.” Lydia replied. “Good.”Liv nodded. “You should look for reports of attempted to abductions that are similar to the way he took Jena. He’s bold so he’s probably tried unsuccessfully a few times. It might help you narrow a comfort zone.” Lydia suggested. Liv gave her a curious look. “I took a class on criminal behavior last semester. I guess some of it stuck.” Lydia shrugged.

The detectives had pulled a backlog of reports of attempted abductions that were similar to Jena’s. Liv and Carisi were busy looking through those and Rollins and Fin were out following a lead when a petite red head walked in nervously. “Can I help you?” Lydia asked looking up from her school work. “I need to report a crime.” The girl said timidly. “Ok.” Lydia replied, standing to guide her to the interview room. “Sit here for a minute, I’ll be right back.” Lydia assured her, gesturing to a chair. She poked her head in the conference room where Liv and Carisi were. “There’s a girl who needs to make a report.” Lydia told Liv. “Can you take her statement. I’ll be there in a few minutes.” Liv said looking up from the file she was reading. “Sure.” Lydia nodded.

“Can I get your name?” Lydia asked sitting across from the red head. “Becks, I mean Rebecca Stanton.” Becks replied. “Ok Becks, just walk me through what happened.” Lydia said. “I was at my friend, Ethan’s, apartment. He had been drinking and was trying to kiss me but I kept pushing him back. I don’t like him like that.” She looked up at Lydia with tears in her eyes. “When it was clear he wasn’t going to give up I decided to leave. He wouldn’t let me. He grabbed my arm and pushed me face down on his couch, lifted my skirt and...” Becks closed her eyes and wiped her tears with her finger tips before continuing, “forced himself inside me.” “Do you know Ethans last name?” Lydia asked softly. “Rhone.” Becks replied. Lydia walked Becks through what to expect as things moved forward. “I can take you to the hospital so you can get checked out and they can do a rape kit.” Lydia said. “You’ll stay with me?” Becks asked. “I will. Let me go tell Lieutenant Benson.” Lydia replied with a soft smile.

Everyone was busy working both cases. Lydia didn’t have an opportunity to work on school work during the day as she bounced between the two victims so she had begged off from seeing Barba after class so she could get some work done. “Can I see you tonight?” Barba texted Friday afternoon. She smiled as she responded. “Definitely.” “Dinner? Pick you up at Six?” He sent back knowing she didn’t have class on Fridays. “Can’t wait.” She replied. “You seem happy.” Becks said as she approached Lydia’s desk. “Oh, sorry, I...” She trailed of not knowing exactly how to respond. “Don’t be. You’re allowed to be happy.” Becks smiled. “What can I help with?” Lydia asked. smiling at Becks ability to set her own grief aside. “Do you have time to get coffee? I just need someone to talk to and you said you’d be there if I needed.” Becks asked. “I can. Let me let Liv know.” Lydia said as she got up from her desk. She bit back a smirk when she saw Barba sitting in Liv office when she entered. She hadn’t even seen him come in. “I’m going to grab coffee with Becks.” Lydia informed Liv. “Is everything alright?” Liv asked. “Yeah, she just needs someone to talk to.” Lydia replied.

“How are you doing with all this?” Lydia asked as they sat at a table away from the other patrons. “Ok, considering.” Becks replied, she paused slightly before adding, “he called me.” “He called?” Lydia clarified. “I didn’t answer but he left a message.” Beck said. “Do you still have the message.” Lydia asked. Becks pulled her phone out and handed it to Lydia so she could hear. “Heeeyyy Becks, it’s Ethan. I just wanted you to know that I still love you even though you’re being a bitch right now. You’ll realize you love me too... one day... annnyyywaaayy, see you soon.” He was clearly drunk and slurring his words. “What did he mean by see you soon?” Lydia asked. “Probably nothing. He was drunk.” Becks said dismissively. “Still you need to show it to Liv.” Lydia said.

Barba was still in Liv’s office when Lydia returned with Becks. “Liv?” Lydia said as she opened the door. “Everything ok?” Liv asked. “Becks has something you need to hear, you too Barba.” Lydia said as she and Becks entered Liv’s office. Becks played the message for them. “That’s a violation of his bail.” Barba said, lifting his eyebrows and pushing his bottom lip up slightly at Liv. “I’ll send Rollins and Carisi to pick him up.” Liv replied. “Thanks.” Becks said, letting out a sigh of relief. “I’ll walk you out.” Lydia smiled at Becks. 

“I may call you as a witness when we take Ethan to trial.” Barba said as they ate dinner. “Given our relationship is that a good idea?” She asked. “No one knows about us so it should be fine, besides you’re the out cry witness and one of the best people I have to speak for Becks character. She’s confided in you and brought you the message Ethan left.” Barba replied. “I’m not going to be able to get out of this am I?” She asked her stomach turning at the thought of being on the stand. “I’ll subpoena you if I have to.” He smirked. She gave him a week smiled. “I’ll be right there the whole time and we’ll go over everything you will say plus questions the defense may ask including how to dodge questions if someone has seen us.” He assured her reaching across the table to squeeze her hand.

Barba pushed her against her apartment door and kissed her as she tried to find her keys. “Don’t you have to go back to the office and prep?” She asked, his lips moving to her neck. “I will in the morning.” He breathed before pressing his lips to hers again. “Unless you plan on mounting me right here, I need to find my keys.” She giggled, pushing him off her long enough to dig in her purse. “I’ve missed you.” He said as he walked her toward her bed, removing his clothes as they went. “I can see that.” She smirked, noticing the bulge in his underwear. He waste little time pulling her clothes off and already had the condom on when he climbed on top of her. “What?” She asked looking at him curiously. He had pushed himself fully in but hadn’t started moving. He was looking at her as she laid beneath him. “I was just... you... you’re beautiful.” He stammered, turning slightly pink. “You know you’re pretty attractive yourself.” She smirked, pulling him to her lips. 

His lips barely left hers as he moved inside her, his hands caressing her face. He began to pump faster when she arched against him, moaning into his kiss. He grunted a few times before she felt his weight collapse on her, his head resting in the crook of her neck as he caught his breath. “Rafael.” She whispered. “Yes.” He smiled hearing her call him by his first name. “I... You make me happy.” She said, not really finding the words she wanted to express how she felt. “I... You make me happy too.” He said, poking fun at her. She rolled her eyes and glared at him as he leaned into kiss her.

“Seriously?” Lydia grumbled as Barba’s phone woke them at three in the morning. “Hi Liv.” He said rising his eyebrows and putting his finger to her lips before she could say anything else. “What? Ok. I thought you had him arrested. Ok. Yeah. No she’s not going to take it well. Yeah. I’ll swing by to pick it up on my way to the office tomorrow morning.” “What happened?” Lydia asked as Barba hung up the phone. He opened his mouth to speak, but closed it and pushed his bottom lip up slightly as her phone rang. “Liv?” She said answering her phone. “Lydia, um, Ethan attacked Becks again last night.” Liv said. “What!? I thought Carisi and Rollins arrested him?” Lydia asked. “They went to but couldn’t find him. They had been searching all night when her neighbors called in a noise complaint.” Liv said. “How is she?” Lydia asked. “She was in bad shape.” Liv said. “Was?” Lydia’s voice hitched as tears formed in her eyes. “She passed twenty minutes ago.” Liv sounded sad when she spoke. “Ok. Thanks for telling me.” Lydia replied, her voice cracking. “Lydia...” Liv started but Lydia interrupted her, “I have to go.” Lydia hung up the phone and cried in Barba’s arms. “I’m sorry.” He said, running his hands through her hair. “I’m not sure why I’m this upset. I mean I didn’t really know her but she was nice and I liked her, you know.” Lydia sobbed. “She also the only victim you’ve lost.” He said knowingly.


	7. Chapter 7

Barba and Liv watched as Lydia paced in the hall outside the courtroom. Barba had her down as one of the first witnesses to help lay out their case against Ethan since she was the one who took Becks’ statement and the one she confided in about the voicemail message Ethan had left. He had talked her through everything she would say and would not say. She felt prepared but the idea of speaking in front of people, especially being questioned by the defense, had her stomach in knots. “You ok?” Carisi asked as he, Rollins, and Fin walked up to them. Lydia’s face lost all color and she darted to the restroom. “She gonna make it?” Rollins asked, looking at Barba slightly concerned. “I hope so.” He replied, looking rather concerned himself.

Lydia took a few controlled breaths as she sat on the stand before Barba guided her through the testimony they had rehearsed. She did well helping Barba create a timeline of events leading to Becks’ death. The defense had tried to object to a few statements but other than that barely even questioned her on cross. Barba gave her a subtle nod of approval when she walked by him to join the detectives watching. “Better?” Rollins asked as Lydia sat down next to her. “Getting there.” Lydia replied, still focusing on her breathing. “You know, if your nausea wasn’t associated with public speaking I’d be teasing you about being pregnant.” Rollins whispered. “That’d be funny.” Lydia chuckled, trying not to let it show on her face that she was trying to remember when she had her last period. She had been so busy she hadn’t been paying attention. The last time she remembered was from before things started with Barba, but that couldn’t be, that would have been over six weeks ago. “Fuck.” She muttered under her breath, thankfully soft enough that Rollins didn’t hear.

“You did great up there.” Liv said as they waited in the hall for Barba. “Yeah? Thanks.” Lydia replied trying not to appear distracted. “You ok?” Carisi asked. “Yeah just still a little anxious.” She replied, before turning to Liv. “Hey Liv, is it ok if I head home. Trial prep put me behind on school work and...” “Yeah, go.” Liv said interrupting her. “Thanks.” Lydia said turning to leave. 

Having stopped at a drug store on her way home she dumped her bags on the couch and headed straight to the bathroom. “Why the hell is this so hard to open?” She muttered to herself as she fumbled to open the pregnancy test she had purchased. She forced herself to walk out of the bathroom so that she would stop watching the little blocks flash as the moved along the results screen. It didn’t really help considering she walked back in every two seconds. Finally the result popped up. “Fuck.” She groaned, looking at the positive result in disbelief. After she stared at the test for a while she sat on her couch and called her doctor. “Really? Not for another week? Ok. Yeah, no Monday afternoon will be fine.”

Lydia decided to wait until the trial was over to tell Barba. Closing arguments were given on Friday morning, a guilty verdict reached before the end of the business day. Barba wanted to get his paperwork finished after the trial so he worked pretty much all day Saturday. “My place? Five?” He texted around noon on Sunday. “See you then.” She responded both excited and dreading seeing him.

She had barely knocked on his door when he opened it and pulled her in, pressing his lips to hers. “Barba.” She said between kisses as he walked her to his room. “Barba.” She tried again but his lips quieted her. He started to remove her clothes. “I need to tell you something.” She finally managed to say but he merely whispered, “after” and continued undressing her. She had missed him, this, so she gave up, deciding telling him after would work too. He sat on the edge of the bed and guided her to sit on him. Taking her breast in his mouth, he ran his hands over her body as she rode him. Her hands gripped tightly in his hair. She making short little moans when he felt her tighten and buckle forward. He rolled her beneath him and thrust a few times grunting his own release, before collapsing next to her.

They were laying on top of his covers still breathing somewhat heavy when he spoke. “So what did you want to tell me?” She closed her eyes and exhaled. “Ok. I really don’t know how to say this... I’m not even sure how I feel...” She was staring at the ceiling as she rambled. “Just tell me.” He said, lifting his eyebrows. She bit her lip and looked at him. “I’m pregnant.” “Is it mine?” He asked. “Is it yours?” She barked. “I just mean you’re clearly experienced. You could have been with someone right before me.” He replied. “I’m experienced?! You’re the one who was soooo proud of themselves after the first... You know what? Never mind.” She grumbled climbing off his bed and picking up her clothes. “I think that came out wrong.” He said back tracking. “No I think it came out just right. So you, you’re just great in bed but I must be a whore.” She fumed. She had dressed rather quickly, everything except the shirt she still had clutched in her hand as she moved to the living room to grab her purse and shoes. “Lydia wait!” Barba called after her, trying to put on his underwear. 

She was at the door when he made it to the living room. “The only person I’ve slept with in two years is you, so yeah, it’s yours.” She yelled, pointing the hand still gripping her shirt at him. “Lydia, wait!” He called as she slammed the door behind her, almost running to the elevator. She saw him exit his apartment in what looked like sweat pants and a t-shirt as the elevator doors closed. She sat her purse on the floor and put her shirt and shoes on while crying as she rode the elevator to the lobby. Barba kept calling but she didn’t want to hear what he had to say so she eventually turned her phone off.

The next morning Lydia considered calling in sick but decided against it. She had been back from lunch for less than five minutes when Barba walked in. “I need to speak with you.” He whispered, standing close to her desk. “This has nothing to do with work so I don’t have to speak with you if I don’t want to.” She said, glaring at him. Rollins, Fin, and Carisi looked at each other. “Alright. You want to talk about it here.” He snapped. “What’s going on?” Liv asked walking out of her office. “Fine.” Lydia huffed, standing up from her desk and following him into the interview room. 

“What else do you have to say Barba?” She snapped once the door was closed. Liv and the detectives watched through the window as the two of them clearly yelled at each other. “We could flip the sound on so we could hear.” Rollins suggested, eliciting a glare from Liv. “It was just a thought.” She shrugged. “How did this happen? We were always careful.” Barba asked, slightly calmer. “The only thing I can think of is that day you got me all worked up in your office. We didn’t exactly use anything that evening.” Lydia replied. “So this is my fault. Aren’t you on birth control?” He snapped. “No, I’m not” She hissed. “Well that’s a bit irresponsible.” He scoffed. “I’m not, because the extra hormones in my body make me crazy. They make me cry at almost anything. And they kill my sex drive. And I don’t mean they dampen it slightly I mean they kill it. I tried lots of different forms, low hormone, forms that bypassed the blood stream but they all effected me the same way. It took years to finally feel like me again, so no, I’m not on birth control.” She yelled. They stared at each other for a moment, before she turned to leave. She gripped the door knob and turned to him. “I only have a month left on my internship. Then I’ll be out of your life.” “Lydia.” He sighed as she walked through the door. “Don’t worry, I’ll deal with it.” She yelled over her shoulder as she headed towards her desk. “Where are you going now?” He called, following her. She reached behind her desk and grabbed her bag. “I have a doctors appointment.” She snapped making her way to the elevator. He followed her on, both of them staring at the other as the door close. “Can I come?” He asked. “If you want.” She huffed.


	8. Chapter 8

Barba followed behind as she walked the ten blocks to her doctors office. “Lydia, slow down.” He said softly as he caught up with her. “Why, Barba? So you can continue insulting me?” She snapped. He gently took her hand and pulling her to stop. She didn’t fight against him, but watched as he licked his bottom lip before pulling it in his mouth, closed his eyes, and took a breath. “I’m sorry.” His eyes were soft when he looked at her and she hated that she wanted to forgive him. “For what?” She asked. “For being a jerk. I panicked. I saw our relationship becoming complicated. I thought about how strongly I felt about you, considering I haven’t known you that long. Then like an idiot I opened my mouth.” He said. “You were an asshole.” Lydia huffed. “I really didn’t mean it the way it came out. We haven’t been together that long, you’re young, beautiful, I felt jealousy at the thought of you with someone else and then I spoke.” He explained, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her into a hug.

She let him hold her hand as they completed the walk to her doctor’s office. Barba found a seat while she checked in. “Do we get married?” He asked as she sat down. She laughed out of shock to his question. “Maybe in three to five years if we don’t drive each other crazy before then.” She replied, taking his hand in hers. “But we’re...” He started but she interrupted, “and that adds a level of complication but is no reason to rush into something. Lets just take this one step at a time.” She smiled. He nodded in response.

“Coleman.” A nurse called. “That’s me.” Lydia smirked when Barba didn’t move. “Oh yeah, your last name.” He smiled standing to follow. He watched as the nurse took her vitals and pulled out a sheet from a cabinet. “Go ahead and undress from the waist down and drape this over you, Dr. Owens will be in shortly.” The nurse instructed before leaving. “This isn’t awkward.” Lydia smirked as she moved behind the curtain to undress. “You know I’ve seen you naked, right?” He teased when she emerged with the sheet wrapped around her waist. “Yes, but somehow this is different.” She replied, climbing on the exam table.

“Lydia, hi.” Dr. Owens said as she entered the room. “You’re here to confirm pregnancy I see. You must be the father.” She continued, glancing at Barba. “Rafael.” He said introducing himself, the corners of his mouth twitching upward slightly at the word father. “I saw you for your yearly about three months ago, correct?” Dr. Owens asked Lydia. “Yes.” Lydia replied. “Then this will be a quick exam. Go ahead and lay back.” She said. “I see what you meant by awkward now.” Barba said taking Lydia’s hand after Dr. Owens had her scoot to the edge of the table. She chuckled at his comment but continued to stare at the ceiling.

“Alright. You can sit up.” Dr. Owens said after a few minutes. “That’s it?” Lydia asked. “I told you it would be quick. I was just checking for anything obvious that may be of concern during pregnancy.” She replied. “And...” Lydia asked. “You’re fine.” Dr. Owens said adjusting the table so Lydia could lean back and pulling up a small ultrasound machine. “Lets look at your baby.” Dr. Owens said adjusting the monitor so they could see and putting clear goop on the probe. Lydia and Barba watched the screen as Dr. Owens moved the probe around Lydia’s stomach. “There,” She said pointing to a small dot on the screen, “that’s your baby.” “That tiny dot?” Lydia asked. “Yep.” Dr. Owens replied flipping on the Doppler, “and that’s its heartbeat.” She recorded a loop and let it play while she looked back at Lydia’s chart. “Congratulations. You’re officially eight weeks.” Dr. Owens said. “Eight weeks?” Barba asked, pulling back from Lydia slightly. “We date pregnancy from first day of the last menstrual cycle. Conception was somewhere between five to seven weeks ago.” She clarified, noticing his reaction. “Oh.” He breathed, as Lydia squeezed his hand.

They were close to his apartment so they went there to talk. “Are you ok?” Lydia asked once they were inside. “I’m getting better. What about you?” He smiled. “Same.” She smirked as he pulled her toward him by her hands, wrapping her arms around his waist as he leaned down to kiss her. “I thought we were going to talk, Mr. Barba?” She teased as his lips moved to her neck. “We will.” He replied, lifting her up and carrying her to his bedroom. He stood in front of her, keeping her close as he removed her clothes, his lips barely parting from hers as though he was afraid she’d disappear if he wasn’t connected to her in some way.

He walked her backwards toward his bed, following as she inched backwards on it, his lips never more than a few inches from hers. His kisses trailed down her neck, her chest, stopping at her stomach. He caressed it gently with his hand before his kisses resumed and he made his way back to her lips tonguing her breast on his path. “What?” He smirked when he noticed she was smiling at him. “Nothing.” She said playfully. She felt him push inside her as his lips met hers again. He was gentle as he moved inside her, occasionally pulling his lips from hers to look at her. When he heard her breathing change he began to thrust faster, pressing his face into the crook of her neck as he came.

They laid entangled in each other’s arms, her fingers running through the hair behind his ear, his tracing shapes on her stomach. “I never thought I wanted kids.” Barba said softly. “Oh.” She said, tensing up slightly. “But...” he added before she say anything, “as I’ve gotten older, been around my friends children...” He paused for a moment, closing his eyes as he exhaled. When he opened them again he made eye contact. “I thought I’d missed my chance.” Lydia smiled and rested her hand on his cheek. “I know we’ve only been together for a short time but I promise you, no matter what happens between us, you’ll always be apart of your kids life.” “I’d like to be a part of both of yours.” He smirked. “Well that would be ideal.” She smiled back, starting to clime out of bed. “Where are you going?” He asked furrowing his brow. “I have class.” She replied, lifting her eyebrows. “Stay a little longer. I’ll have my car drop you off.” He coaxed, gently pulling her back in bed. “Twenty minutes.” She smirked, letting him wrap her back in his arms. “We’re good?” He asked. “Yeah, we’re good.” She replied.

The next morning, Lydia had a meeting with Professor Thomas to talk about her dissertation so she didn’t make it to the precinct until close to eleven. “Lydia. Can I see you for a minute?” Liv asked guiding Lydia to her office. “Uh, ok.” She replied noticing Rollins, Fin, and Carisi watching with serious looking faces. “What’s going on?” She asked as Liv shut the door. “Carisi has a friend who works security in a residential building.” Liv said. “Ok.” Lydia replied, still confused. “Barba’s building.” Liv added, lifting an eyebrow. “Still don’t follow.” Lydia said, returning her brow lift. Liv pulled footage from an elevator up on her computer. “This is you isn’t it?” Liv asked. Lydia’s eyes went wide as she saw herself enter the elevator crying in nothing but her bra and skirt. “Yes but that’s completely out of context.” Lydia blurted. “It looks like you were attacked, that’s why Carisi’s friend gave him the footage. He didn’t know we knew you.” Liv said.

“I wasn’t attacked.” Lydia affirmed. “You entered the elevator from Barba’s floor.” Liv said, her eyes looking sad. “You think Barba attacked me?” Lydia almost laughed. “We’re just going by what the tape looks like. Why don’t you fill me in.” Liv said calmly. “Because it really isn’t any of your business.” Lydia replied. “Your clothes are disheveled, you finish dressing in the elevator while crying...” Liv started. “He’s an ADA Liv, your ADA.” Lydia stated. “That doesn’t mean he’s above the law.” Liv replied. “That’s not what I meant. You really think he’s capable of hurting anyone?” Lydia asked a little shocked at Liv. “I didn’t, but this coupled with the exchange between you two yesterday... I’ve seen things like this happened before.” Liv replied, with sad eyes.

Lydia stared at Liv for a moment before asking. “Where’s Barba?” “Why?” Liv responded as Lydia stood and went to the window in Liv’s office that looked into interrogation. “Really, Liv?” She said tilting her head, after she lifted the blinds to see Barba sitting by himself at a table. “You really think he could hurt me? How long have you worked with him again?” Lydia asked rhetorically as she opened the door leading from Liv’s office to the interrogation room. “Lydia?” He said when the door opened. “Come in here.” Lydia said gesturing to Liv’s office with her head. Lydia stood close to Barba’s as she walked with him toward Liv’s desk.

“Show him.” Lydia said gesturing to Liv’s computer. Liv played the footage of Lydia on the elevator. “That looks bad.” Barba said. “Yes it does.” Liv said, not exactly happy that Lydia had pulled him into her office. “I was upset. We had had an argument.” Lydia started, not really knowing how to explain without going into more detail than she really wanted to. “Arguments don’t typically end with half naked women crying on elevators.” Liv stated. “What will it take for you to believe that nothing happened?” Lydia asked. Barba kept quiet, knowing Liv needed Lydia to speak. “How’d you lose your shirt?” Liv asked. Lydia turned slightly pink. “That happened before the argument.” She replied, sheepishly. “How?” Liv asked. “You really need me to spell it out for you?” Lydia asked.

“You’re sleeping together?” Liv asked, her eyes darting between them, finally getting what Lydia was trying to not have to say. “For almost two months now.” Lydia replied. “So you argued after?” Liv asked. “Yes. I was getting dressed during the argument because I didn’t want to stay and listen to him anymore. I didn’t quite finish by the time I made it to his door. I wasn’t exactly concerned that I was only in my bra at the time.” Lydia said. “So this was just a lover quarrel?” Liv asked, looking relieved. “Yes.” Lydia replied. “Ok... Are we good Barba?” Liv asked, looking at him. “We are.” He nodded with a small smirk. “Can we go now?” Lydia asked. “You can, but you may have to face a few questions in the bullpen.” Liv smirked. “Rollins saw this?” Lydia asked pointing to the video still pulled up on Liv’s computer. “Rollins, Fin, and Carisi.” Liv said, her smirk growing larger.


	9. Chapter 9

“This’ll be fun.” Lydia sighed as the detectives looked up from their desk when they exited Liv’s office. “What are you ashamed of me?” Barba teased. “No, it’s just Rollins is going to be so pleased with herself.” Lydia smirked turning to face him. “They were going to find out eventually.” He smiled, tucking her hair behind her ear. “I know.” Lydia sighed. “I guess we should get this over with.” Barba said, taking Lydia’s hands in his. “I don’t want to mention the baby yet.” She whispered. “I wasn’t planning on it.” He smiled.

“Ok, now I’m really confused.” Fin said as Barba and Lydia spoke outside Liv’s office. “I’m not.” Rollins smirked. “Care to fill us in?” Carisi said. Rollins rolled her eyes. “Look at them.” She said, gesturing to Barba and Lydia as Barba pushed Lydia’s hair behind her ear. “What?” Carisi asked still confused. “Their together.” Fin clarified for him. “Then why was she crying?” Carisi asked. “Your telling me you never made a girl cry, Carisi?” Rollins question, giving him a curious look. “Well... oh.” Carisi replied, as he thought about his past relationships. 

“I guess we need to tell you guys something.” Lydia said as they approached the detectives with Barba’s hand on the small of her back. “No, we figured it out.” Fin smiled. “Then why’d you leave me sitting in interrogation?” Barba asked, lifting his eyebrows and tilting his head forward slightly. “We figured it out a minute age, while you two were talking over there.” Carisi replied, gesturing toward Liv’s office. “Ok. Great. Everyone knows now.” Lydia said starting to turn away, hoping to avoid more questions. “Uh, wait.” Rollins said. “So close.” Lydia whispered, causing Barba to chuckle. “How long has this been going on?” Rollins questioned. “Not that long.” Lydia replied, vaguely. “So that day you were all ‘hi Barba,’ were you two...” She pointed her finger back and forth between them. “That may have been somewhere around the beginning.” Lydia responded. “I knew it.” Rollins grinned. “Are you satisfied now?” Lydia asked, rolling her eyes. “Yeah, yeah, fine.” Rollins said still grinning.

“Hey Barba?” Carisi called as the group started to disperse. “Yes.” Barba said. “No hard feelings about the whole interrogation room thing right? I mean we were always going to talk to Lydia see what her side was before we questioned you, but we all knew there was an explanation.” Carisi said. “We’re good Carisi.” Barba affirmed. “Ok good.” Carisi added before heading back to his desk. “I have to get back to my office.” Barba said, turning to Lydia. “You’re going to leave me alone with Rollins and her game of twenty questions?” Lydia teased. “You’ll be fine.” He smirked, pulling her against him and giving her a quick kiss. “Get a room.” Rollins teased from her desk. Barba chuckled as Lydia rolled her eyes. “I’ll pick you up after class.” He said. “Ok.” She replied.

“So you put him in your phone under the initials JA just so his name wouldn’t pop up when he texted you at work?” Rollins asked when Lydia sat down at her desk. “No I put him in as jackass. It was just lucky only the initials popped up.” Lydia smiled. “The bickering was it just for show?” Rollins asked. “No. I call him out when I don’t agree with him and you know him, he can’t let anyone have the last word so...” Lydia started but Rollins finished for her, “the bickering’s real. I get it.” “Get what?” Lydia asked. “It’s foreplay.” Rollins smirked. “Really?” Lydia replied, throwing her pen at Rollins who giggled.

“How was the rest of you day?” Barba asked as he picked her up after class. “Not bad actually.” Lydia chuckled. “What’s so funny.” Barba asked. “Nothing.” Lydia replied still smiling. Barba lifted one eyebrow and tilted his head. “Rollins just equated our banter to foreplay at one point.” Lydia smirked. “That’s nice.” He grumbled. “It’s probably at least partially true, at least for you.” Lydia said. “What’s that supposed to mean?” He asked. “Come on, you know you like it.” She smiled. “Maybe a little.” He smirked pulling her closer.

“Lydia?” Barba said as they laid in his bed. “Go to sleep Barba.” She replied sleepily, squeezing him slightly where her arm draped over him. “I will I’m just going to propose something. I don’t want an answer yet, just think about it, ok?” He said. “Ok.” She yawned. “I’d like you to move in with me.” He stated. “We’ve been together two months.” Lydia said, fully awake now. “I know. Just hear me out and think about it. That’s all I ask.” He said. “Ok, tell me why you think we should move in together.” She replied. “You’re at my place or I’m at yours pretty much every night I’m not being overworked and even those nights I find myself wishing I could at least curl up next to you when I get home. It would make the mornings easier on work days. When the baby gets here I want to be around and not just sometimes.” Barba said. “But...” She started but he didn’t let her finish. “Think about it. Make a pro/con list. Whatever you need to do but really think about it and if your answer is still no then I’ll except it.” “Ok. I’ll think about it.” She smiled, pulling up slightly to kiss him.

The next day, Carisi and Fin were investigating another body dump off a highway that matched the m.o. of the serial they were still investigating. Rollins was going over previous evidence at her desk. There wasn’t a living victim so Lydia had been working on some school work when she decided to give Barba’s suggestion of moving in together some actual though. She flipped to a clean page in her spiral and started listing some pros and cons. She was leaned back in her chair with her knees pulled up using them to rest her spiral on and had been engrossed in her thoughts for a while when Rollins walked by, grabbing her spiral. “Seriously?” Lydia snapped. “What ya working on?” Rollins asked, looking at her list. “School, can I have it back?” Lydia sighed. “You need a pro/con list for class?” Rollins said, giving her a look suggesting she didn’t believe her. “Can I just have it back?” Lydia said. “Wait, wait. Let’s see. Cons. Way too soon. No place to go if need space. Wrong reasons. Well that was vague.” Rollins smirked before she continued. “Pros. Could be nice to go home to. Would be easier when...” Rollins stopped reading the list to ask, “Easier when what?” Lydia just glared at her. “Hmmm...” Rollins smirked as she continued. “He should be around. Really like sleeping in his arms. Love???” She stopped reading and looked at Lydia. “You love him?” She blurted. “Maybe. I don’t know. That’s why there are question marks beside it.” Lydia said snatching her spiral back. 

“What’s the list for?” Rollins asked as she watched Lydia close the spiral and put it in her bag. “No reason.” Lydia replied. “Yeah... no one makes a list like that if their not trying to make a decision about something. Are you thinking of breaking up with him?” She asked. “No. Did you even pay attention to the list as you read it?” Lydia questioned, trying to figure out what on the list would make Rollins mind go to breaking up. “Well what then?” Rollins asked. Lydia looked at Rollins and then sighed. “He asked me to move in with him.” “Isn’t that a little soon? It’s been what two months?” Rollins asked. “That’s what I said. He told me to make the list.” Lydia sighed. Rollins chuckled softly. “What?” Lydia asked, pursing her lips slightly. “I didn’t read the whole thing but you do realize your pro side is at least five times the length of your con side.” Rollins smirked. “Yeah, I do.” Lydia grumbled, mostly at how amused Rollins was. 

“Did you make a list?” Barba asked when she got to his apartment after class. “I did.” She replied. “So...” He said, lifting his eyebrow. “I’m still thinking.” She smirked. “Can I see it?” He asked. “What? No.” She panicked, thinking of the word love sitting in the middle of her pro column. She may be toying with the thought but she was in no way ready to tell him that. “Oh, I see.” He said, clearly upset. “No. Rafael...” She said moving toward him. “It’s has to be bad if you don’t want me to see it.” He said, pulling away from her touch. “No it’s not. I promise.” She assured him. “Then why wont you show it to me?” He asked, a mixture of sadness and anger in his eyes. “Fine.” She sighed, digging in her bag. She opened the spiral to the page and clutched it too her chest as she walked back to face him. “Just remember these are thoughts that I wrote out as they came to me, trying not to overthink them too much.” She said before handing him her spiral.

“The pro side is long.” He smirked when he glance at it. “I’m still thinking.” She replied rolling her eyes. “Yeah, yeah.” He smiled as he began to read. She watched as his eyes moved across the page and then stopped. “You love me?” He asked, looking up at her. “I don’t know. I was listing things and it popped in my head so I wrote it down and then I added the question marks because I wasn’t sure why I felt the need to add it to the list and then... I don’t know. I don’t hate you.” She rambled. There’s quite a range between hate and love.” He smirked, stepping closer to her. “You know what I mean.” She sighed. “Not really.” He smiled, pulling her against him. 

She was greeted by his lips when she looked up. His arms reached to untuck her dress shirt as her hands touched his face. She pushed herself up to her toes in an attempt to get closer to him as he unbuttoned her shirt from the bottom up. Her hands moved to pull his shirt over his head. He had been home for a while and had changed into clothes slightly more comfortable than his suite. He pushed her shirt off her shoulders as her walked her toward his bedroom, more of their clothes littering their path as they went. 

He scooted back on his bed as she climbed on top of him, lowering herself down gently. He gripped her ass as she started to ride him, her hips grinding, her hair falling around them, their lips never parting. He moved his left arm around her waist as his right found her breast, letting her control the pace. After a while she sat up and started riding him faster, moaning when his thumb made contact. She collapsed against him again when she came, panting as she pressed her lips against his again. Never leaving her, he rolled her beneath him and continued thrusting, his hands gently gripping her face on either side of his lips as his weight pressed against her. He grunted as her pushed deeper into her, tensing briefly before she felt his full weight collapse on her. She ran her hand through his hair, watching him catch his breath. 

“Lydia.” He said, still pulsating inside her. “I don’t hate you either.” He smiled. “Jackass.” She smirked lightly smacking him on the arm. He rolled off her and pulled her into his arms. “I’m teasing but I get how you feel.” He said. “You do?” She asked turning a little pink. “You like me. You really really like me.” He teased, wrapping her in his arms so that she couldn’t get away. “No. I hate you.” She giggled, pushing against him. 

“If we do this...” Lydia started while she was using his arm as a pillow. “Do what?” Barba asked, running his hand through her hair. “Live together.” Lydia replied. “Are you saying yes?” He asked. “If we do this,” Lydia said, emphasizing the word if, “I want to keep my apartment, at least through the end of my lease.” “Ok. How long is your lease.” Barba asked. “I have ten months left but I have to give two months notice.” Lydia said. “You want to try like a dry run?” Barba said. “Something like that.” Lydia replied. “Ok, but you have to really move. Your apartment would be there as a safety net if needed, not somewhere you keep running back to get something from.” He countered. “You’ll have to make room for my all books and things.” She said. “And we can talk about whose dishes and shelves to keep in the morning.” He smiled. “Ok.” She breath. “Is that a yes?” He smirked. “Yes.” Lydia replied, smiling when he pulled his arm tighter around her.


	10. Chapter 10

“What are you doing?” Barba yawned as he entered his kitchen at seven Saturday morning. Lydia had every cabinet opened and was standing in the middle staring at the items within. “I’m trying to see whose kitchen stuff to keep.” Lydia replied. “And...” Barba smirked. “You know for someone I’ve never seen cook you have some really nice things.” She replied. “Does that mean we’re keeping mine?” He asked. “Yeah. There’s just a few things from my kitchen that you don’t have that I’ll want to grab.” She said, starting to close cabinets. “You know if you’re going to get me up at seven on a Saturday you should at least have made coffee.” He grumbled on his path to the coffee maker. “Why? I can’t have any.” She huffed. “That’s not true, you can have one cup.” He smirked. “What’s the point in that?” She grumbled. “None really.” He replied, realizing one cup would just be an annoying tease without the rest of the pot to follow.

“How long have you been up?” He asked, noticing what appeared to be to scale drawings of his apartment on his kitchen counter. “I couldn’t sleep. I tried to work on my dissertation but couldn’t focus so I measured your apartment.” She shrugged. “When did I get a tape measure?” He asked noticing one sitting by her purse. “I brought it from my place after I measured the furniture I’d like to keep if possible.” She said as she sat on a stool at his counter. “Is this what they call nesting?” He asked, truthfully perplexed by her behavior. “I don’t think that happens until later. This is just me. I plan. I make list, map everything out before I jump into a task.” Lydia said, moving the tiny pieces of paper she had scaled to represent their furniture around the drawing of his apartment. “Did you draw an actual couch on there?” He asked noticing the tiny furniture pieces for the first time. “I’ve been up since four and I like to draw.” She said dismissively. “If this is normal, I’m not sure I want to see you nest.” He smirked.

“Your internship ends in two weeks and Liv mentioned that the squad wanted to go out to say goodbye.” Barba said as he poured himself a cup of coffee. “I can’t go out. How do I explain why I’m not drinking?” Lydia asked more rhetorically than anything. “That’s why I suggested we all go to dinner. Not drinking might be less noticeable at dinner.” Barba replied. “Rollins will notice.” Lydia said rolling her eyes. “Then they notice. They’re going to find out eventually.” Barba smiled. “Ok. Dinner with everyone would be nice. I’m going to miss working with them.” Lydia smiled. “I’ll let Liv know.” He said, taking a sip of coffee.

“Oh before I forget, my mom wants to meet you.” He said this rather fast, squinting his eyes as he waited for her response. “You told your mom?” Lydia almost whined. “I told her I was seeing someone. I haven’t mentioned you’re pregnant.” He said, defending himself. “Yes but when she finds out I’m going to be the little tramp thats been pregnant for the entire length of her relationship with her son.” Lydia groaned. “You clearly don’t know my mami. You could be extorting money from me but as long as you managed to give her a nieto she’ll love you.” He chuckled. “Nieto?” Lydia asked raising an eyebrow. “Grandchild.” He smiled, not realizing he had even switched to Spanish.

“Ok, when.” Lydia sighed. “We can do lunch tomorrow, get it out of the way.” Barba suggested. “May as well.” Lydia replied. “I can meet your family.” He suggested. “That’s not necessary.” Lydia said tugging at her bottom lip. “But I’d like to.” Barba offered. He could tell something was wrong but couldn’t tell what. “It’s just me.” Lydia sighed, spinning a ring on her right ring finger he had never really noticed before. “Lydia?” Barba inquired softly. She took a deep breath and then looked at him. “I don’t like to talk about it because it makes me sad, so after I tell you you can ask questions but don’t randomly bring it up, ok?” She said. “Ok.” He nodded. “When I was thirteen my mother was killed in a car wreck. She was my fathers world and he never quite got over it. He drank himself to an early grave about a month before I turned eighteen. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my father. He wasn’t a mean drunk or anything, he was just sad.” She said. “Is this why you worked so hard to saved for school?” Barba asked pulling her closer. “It was important to my mom that I go to college. We lived in Texas but she was obsessed with Columbia. I never got to ask her why. I may overcompensate, trying to live up to the person I hope she wanted me to be.” She wiped the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes. “I miss them. I try to remember them from when she was alive and they were happy. I often wonder what would have happened if that truck driver hadn’t fallen asleep... but that’s counter productive. I’m sorry. I haven’t cried about this in years. It must be the hormones.” She sniffled, trying to laugh. Barba wrapped his arms around her, ignoring her attempt to dismiss her pain and let her cry. 

“Ok,” she said after a bit as she dried her eyes, “I’m good.” “What do I need to do to help you over plan packing up your apartment?” He asked, still holding her. “Figure out how we can fit all this in your apartment while I go assess your cleaning supplies.” She chuckled pushing her drawing of his apartment closer to him. He looked at her like she was crazy and then started moving the little furniture pieces around.

“What about this one?” Lydia asked as she walked out of her closet in her tenth outfit that morning. They had stayed at her place the night before because she was nervous to meet his mom and wanted to have access to her closet. “You know I think I like the blue one.” Barba teased. Lydia glared at him finding his humor in her anxiety slightly annoying. “You have looked great in everything you’ve put on. You’re overthinking this.” He assured her. “So this is ok?” She asked. “You look great.” He smiled moving to wrap his arms around her. She was in a deep purple dress with cap sleeves, a v-neck, and a flowing skirt that hit at her knees. “When do we have to be there?” She asked. “In an hour.” He smirked. “Oh...” She said glancing at her closet. “But we can leave now, maybe walk some of your nervous energy off.” He suggested, anything to prevent her from changing one more time.

Barba pulled her seat out for her as they sat at a table to wait for his mom. “She’s going to hate me.” Lydia mumbled to herself. “No she’s not.” Barba chuckled. “She will when she finds out.” She said. “No she wont.” He smirked. “She’ll think I’m too young for you.” She mumbled. “I really doubt that.” He replied. She was about to ask why when a woman approached their table. “Rafi, hi.” She said as he stood to hug her. “Hi mami.” He said allowing Lydia the opportunity to stand. “You must be Lydia. My Rafi seems to like you.” She smiled taking Lydia’s hand in hers. “Lydia, this is my mother, Lucia Barba.” Barba said, officially introducing them. “It’s nice to meet you.” Lydia said as they sat down. “She’s young Rafi. I still have hope for nietos?” Lucia asked, causing Lydia to chuckle as Barba almost whined, “Mami.”

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Barba asked as they walked back to his apartment. “No. I kind of love your mom.” She smiled. “Told you.” He smirked. Lydia rolled her eyes. “You can tell her first.” Lydia said. “Tell her what?” He asked. “About the baby. I’d like to wait until after the first trimester but it makes sense for the first person to know besides us to be family. It should be your mom.” Lydia said. “You have no idea how happy you are going to make her.” He smiled, knocking her slightly off balance as he hugged her.


	11. Chapter 11

“Carisi, you and Fin go to Brooklyn. They picked up a suspect attempting to abduct a girl in the same manner as our possible serial. Rollins, take Lydia and go to the hospital to talk with the victim.” Liv instructed early Monday morning. “Was she assaulted?” Rollins asked. “No but she was injured when she fought back. A Good Samaritan happened to see and actually intervened, detaining the suspect until the police arrived.” Liv replied. Despite their many setbacks in this case they had put together a lot of information. Carisi had identified almost half of the Jane Does, all of which we former runaways, or had little family to notice if they were missing. They all also worked night shifts at diners or cleaning services and had predictable routines. Another break was that their attacker had left DNA. Now that they had a suspect, Liv had the lab run the DNA on all the victims they had.

“Here’s your warrant for Jason Philips DNA.” Barba said, handing a paper to Liv, noticing Lydia and Rollins sitting in interview with a girl whose arm was in a cast. “She broke it during the struggle.” Liv said. “Can she make an ID?” He asked. “She should be able to. Lydia’s called Jena in to make one as well later this afternoon.” Liv replied. “He told Jena his real name?” Barba questioned. “He didn’t expect her to live.” Liv sighed. Barba glanced back at Lydia before following Liv into her office to watch Carisi and Fin interrogate the suspect. Liv tapped on the glass and Carisi poked his head through the door. She handed him the warrant and he nodded. “Alright Philips, we have a warrant for your DNA, so is there anything you want to tell us before it ties you to each one of these girls?” Carisi asked pointing to the pictures laid out on the table. “I want a lawyer.” Philips hissed.

“How solid is your case?” Lydia asked as Barba helped her pack up her apartment Wednesday evening. Her class had been cancelled so she as taking advantage of the extra time, especially since the plan was to move her in over the weekend. “Pretty solid, although I’m not sure I’ll be taking it to trial.” He said as he placed more books in a box. “Why not?” Lydia asked. “Open cases similar to the one here popped up in at least four different states. The FBI is coming tomorrow. They’ll probably take over.” Barba explained. “Is that why you can help me tonight?” She smiled. “Pretty much.” He smirked.

Barba hired movers to get all of Lydia’s things to his place. He didn’t want her lifting anything and knew she’d be too stubborn not to help if he didn’t. “We could have done this. It’s not that much stuff.” Lydia said as she watched them bring the last her boxes into his apartment. “Yes but isn’t this so much easier?” He smirked. “Yes.” She huffed stubbornly, playfully pushing against him as he pulled her to him. “You up for dinner Friday after work?” He asked. “Sure.” She smiled. “Good. That’s when Liv and the detectives want to go out since it’s your last day.” He said. “Yay.” She said dryly. “I really doubt they’ll notice.” He smirked. “I have so much work to do before the semester ends I wouldn’t drink even if I wasn’t pregnant.” She sighed. “See, you have an excuse.” He smiled. 

“I can’t believe today was your last day.” Rollins said as they were seated for dinner. “I know. It feels like it flew by.” Lydia smiled. “You know, you’ve been a nice addition. I might be able to work out a paid position for you.” Liv offered. “I appreciate that, but I have a job lined up after graduation.” Lydia replied. “Doing what?” Carisi asked. “At a practice one of my mentors recommended me to. One of their psychiatrists is retiring in September and I’ll be taking their spot.” Lydia answered. “You don’t start until September?” Barba questioned. “Yeah. I’ll have a three month break between school ending and the job starting. Timing couldn’t be more perfect.” Lydia smirked. The corner of Barba’s lips twitched up slightly. “What are you going to do during your break?” Fin asked. “I’ve been crazy busy for as long as I can remember so my plan is to be as lazy as possible.” Lydia smiled. “You know you’re welcome to stop by whenever you want.” Liv said. “I’m sure I’ll be around.” Lydia said as she glanced at Barba.

“I told you no one would notice.” Barba said as they entered his apartment. “Or they just didn’t say anything.” Lydia shrugged. “Rollins, not say something.” Barba said, lifting his brow. “Yeah you’re right, no one noticed.” She smiled, as she turned to face him. “I thought you had a lot of school work?” He asked smirking slightly when she reached to loosen his tie. “I do.” She said, pressing her lips to his. She removed his tie, jacket, and vest as he walked her towards his bed. “Isn’t something due tonight?” He asked between kisses. “Yes.” She panted as she unbuttoned his shirt. “You know despite how good you look in them, the number of layers you wear is really annoying when you are in a hurry to remove them.” He smirked at her statement and helped her remove his remaining clothing. 

“I’m going to need you to be quick.” She said before she pushed him on the bed. “That’s not exactly how I work.” He hummed in her ear as she climbed on him. He picked her up so that he could move her beneath him. “Rafael.” She scolded as he started kissing down her chest and stomach, ignoring her as he continued downward. She moaned as he flicked his tongue on her, working his fingers inside. Holding her in place as she gripped his hair with one hand and the sheets with the other, he alternating between softly flicking her with his tongue and sucking on her. When she started to arch he intensified his touch, gripping her tighter. “Raf...” She panted after she came, but he didn’t stop, causing her to squeeze her thighs against his head as her body convulsed. He smirked to himself and started kissing her body on his way back to her lips. Once his lips met hers she felt him push into her, giving her hardly any time to recover. “You ok?” He asked when she gasped. “Yeah, you just usually give me a bit more time between.” She panted. “You told me to be quick.” He smirked as he moved to his knees and started to thrust, enjoying his view of her laying in front of him. He watched her arch and grip the sheets again when he rubbed his thumb on her clit. “Fuck.” She croaked, buckling as she came again. He moved his hand and lowered himself to kiss her as he continued to pump inside her, taking pity on her, grunting his own release moments later.

He held her as they laid in bed. “Can I help you with whatever you have due tonight?” He asked, starting to feel a little guilty for taking up so much of her time. Although, she had started it. “How are you at proof reading?” She smiled as she rotated to look at him. “Pretty good.” He smirked. “Good. You can be a second set of eyes. I’ve looked at the paper so many times now, I know I’m missing some blatant typos.” She said running her fingers though his hair. “All you need to do is edit your paper?” He asked. “Yes.” She said. “When is it due?” He asked. “Midnight, why?” She questioned. “You need,” he glanced at the clock, “three hours to edit your paper.” “I need to have time to make changes if I need to. Also I will take the full time to make sure it’s perfect before turning it in, but I can’t wait until too late incase something happens with the internet or the schools server, so I really only have until eleven thirty, and...” she was still rattling off her reasons for needing more time when he pressed his lips to hers. “I’m obsessing aren’t I?” She sighed when their lips parted. “Just a little.” He smirked. “Fine. I’ll read through it and make changes one more time and then you can proof it and I’ll turn it in.” She pouted. 

Barba watched her as she slipped her underwear back on before pausing. She looked at him, smiled, and picked his dress shirt up off the floor, slipping it on. It hung loosely on her small frame and Barba made an involuntary deep throaty sound at the sight of her. “Is this ok?” She asked innocently, the corners of her mouth twitching up. “Yeah... Yes.” He sputtered, watching her as she left the bedroom to go work on her paper. He dressed in pajama pants and a t-shirt and went to join her in the living room. She was sitting Indian style on his couch with her laptop and completely engrossed in her paper. 

“Ok.” Lydia said, startling him slightly as he read at the other end of the couch. “You’re finished?” He asked. “Yes. I think so.” She said handing him her laptop, and turning to look at him. “I will focus better if you’re not watching me.” He smirked, looking at her over her laptop. “Yeah, ok.” She said, getting up to anxiously pace in the kitchen. “So...” She inquired from the kitchen after twenty minutes. “I’m not done yet.” He replied. She impatiently came and sat next to him. “And I thought I was high strung when I was in school.” He chuckled. “Have you found anything I need to fix?” She asked ignoring his comment. “Not that I see. It’s not over a topic I’m familiar with but I haven’t found any grammatical errors.” He said. “Are you sure?” She asked taking the laptop back from him. “Pretty sure.” He assured her. “I’m going to check it one more time and then turn it in.” She said. “Ok, but don’t take too long.” He replied. “Why?” She asked, looking at him. “I might not be able to wait much longer to take that shirt off you.” He smirked.


	12. Chapter 12

“Mr. Barba? Lydia’s here.” Carmen said as she poked her head in his office. “Great send her in.” He replied. Carmen stepped aside allowing Lydia to pass. She was a little over six months along and could no longer hide the small bump showing on her tiny frame. “Oh Carmen. Can you hold my calls, I don’t want to be interrupted during lunch, say the next hour.” Barba added, closing the blinds to his office. “Sure.” She smiled.

“I brought food from that little Cuban place in the Bronx you like.” Lydia smiled. “You’re amazing you know that.” He said clearing a spot for them the eat at his desk. “How’s your dissertation coming?” He asked as they ate, knowing she had to defend it in less than two months. “I’ve made some good progress. Thomas is reading it over again. Really I’m down to just editing and starting to put together my arguments for when I defend it.” She sighed, that being the thing she was least looking forward to this semester. “I can help with that if you want?” He smiled. “Do you have time?” She asked. “I’m sure I can fit you in.” He said lifting his brows and tilting his head down. It was one her favorite of his faces. 

She stood and walked around his desk to give him a kiss. “I’ll have to find a way to thank you.” She smiled. He stood when he noticed a mischievous look in her eye. “Lydia.” He scolded, not that it deterred her from reaching to unbutton his slacks. “What? We still have twenty five minutes.” She pouted. “You are too loud.” He said, tilting his head down to look at her. “ You can make it up to me tonight.” She smirked as she ran her hand along his length. “Lydia.” He exhaled. “And when you do, don’t be gentle.” She whispered in his ear, smiling when she felt him harden in her hand.

“What are you doing?” He asked when she sank to her knees. “All you need to worry about Mr. Barba, is staying quiet.” She replied not giving him a chance to respond before she took him in her mouth. He fought back a moan as she took him deeper, gripping her hair. Lydia moved her tongue along his base as she bobbed her head. Barba made soft deep throaty sounds as he tried to keep quiet. “Lydia. I...” He said in a throaty whisper as he searched for something to release into. She hummed softly before she gripped her hands tightly against the back of his thighs not allowing him to pull out, but instead taking him fully down her throat. He grunted as quietly as he could as he gripped his desk, not being able to hold back any longer.

Barba leaned on his desk panting as Lydia stood and whispered in his ear. “Don’t forget tonight, you own me.” He glared at her, fighting back a smirk as he adjusted himself so he could redress. “You might want to come up with a safe word for later.” He said, his eyes still intense. She was about to respond when there was a knock at his door. She covered her mouth to hide her chuckle at the face he made and went to open it. “Sorry Mr. Barba. I know you said an hour but Lieutenant Benson and Detective Rollins are here.” Carmen said. “You can send them in.” He replied as he started to clean up the remnants from their lunch. Lydia grinned at him as she helped. “Barba,” Liv started when she noticed Lydia, “Lydia, hi. How are you?” Both her and Rollins glancing at her stomach. “I’m good. How are you guys?” Lydia asked, ignoring their glances. “Good.” Both Liv and Rollins replied simultaneously. “Well I’ll get out of the way, I just stopped by for lunch.” She smiled holding the bag containing the trash up. “Oh and Rafael, don’t forget, grapefruit, for tonight.” Lydia smiled causing Barba to take a deep breath. “It was nice seeing you guys.” Lydia said to Liv and Rollins as she headed out the door. “Bye.” They both said. “You knocked her up?” Rollins blurted after the door shut behind Lydia. “Tactful, as always, Rollins.” Barba smirked. 

“What do you have there?” Lydia asked when Barba entered their apartment. “You’ll see.” He smiled, gripping the bag a little tighter as she approached him. He turned, stopping to face her when she continued to follow him. “I’m going to need you to go sit on the couch.” He smirked. “But...” She started but he interrupted her, “Sit or I wont pay you back for earlier.” His face serious knowing she had been insatiable since the beginning of her second trimester and would follow his instructions without argument. She breathed out a little puff of air but sat silently on the couch, watching as he disappeared in their bedroom.

She looked up when he walked back into the living room. “You’re sticking with grapefruit.” He smirked. “Am I going to need it?” She smiled. “Do you want to need it?” He asked pulling her against him. “Kind of.” She smirked, running her fingers into his hair. He kissed her as he walked her to the bedroom removing her clothes as they went. He gently pushed her to sit at the end of their bed. “Lay back.” He said, adding, “no, on the edge.” When she started to scoot back. Leaning over her he kissed her while pinning her wrist up by her head. She heard the Velcro but didn’t really pay attention to it until he wrapped something around her wrist. “Rafael?” She questioned, breaking away from his lips. “I’ll stop if you want but saying my names not going to do it.” He smirked, putting her other wrist in another restraint making it impossible to move her arms more than a few inches. Her legs were bent and spread from where he had been leaning between them and she watched as he wrap restraints around them as well. She wiggled, testing to see if she was really incapable of really moving, both excited and anxious to find that she was.

He stood back admiring her laying in front of him for a moment before teasing her, running his fingers along her thighs, stomach, chest, but never quite making the contact she wanted. “Rafael.” She whimpered. The corners of his lips twitched slightly but he didn’t give her what she wanted. He began removing his clothes watching her become more agitated the longer he took. “Rafael Barba, you better do something soon.” She scolded. He couldn’t suppress the smirk as he leaned over her again, kissing her as his hands found her breast, his tip teasing her opening. She was breathing heavily when his lips moved to her neck, then down, engulfing a nipple. He took two fingers and roughly rammed them inside her, enjoying the sound she made. He continued his kisses down her stomach to her thighs, gently licking her clit. He lightly teased her with his tongue in contrast to his fingers probing her. The more she moaned the harder he tongued until he was sucking hard. He heard her moan loudly and felt her jerk against the restraints. She couldn’t close her legs, couldn’t pull away. The only thing she could do was let him continue through her orgasm. “Fuck... Raf... Please...” She pleaded but he kept going, curling his now soaked fingers as he softened the flicks of his tongue, listening to the almost inaudible sounds escaping her. 

The now gentle touch coupled with how sensitive she was sent her over the edge again. He lost count of how many times he felt her body twitch and try to pull away as he alternated between gently flicking his tongue against her and sucking on her clit. “Raf... Ok... I can’t... Fuck... gr... grape... fruit.” She finally managed, rethinking making her safe word two syllables. Barba immediately stopped and wiped his mouth as he stood to look at her, not bothering to hide his smirk. “Was your plan to just keep that up until I caved?” She panted. “Pretty much.” He replied. “Have I ever told you you’re a jackass.” She said playfully. “I believe you’ve mentioned it.” He hummed, leaning down to kiss her as he removed the restraints. 

It took a minute to get her body to cooperate with her again but once she did she managed to roll over to her hands and knees. “What are you doing?” He asked, looking at her curiously. “I need you inside me.” She almost begged. “You really are insatiable.” He smirked, as he climbed behind her. “Shut up and fuck me.” She chided, enjoying the fullness she felt when he pressed into her. “Oh and Barba,” he rolled his eyes at her use of his last name, “if you touch my clit right now, I will never give you head in your office again.” “We both know that’s an empty threat,” He smiled as he nestled his fingers against her scalp and pulled her head back, “but I’ll behave.”

“Rollins wants you to call her.” Barba told her. They were laying under the covers, her head on his chest and his arm wrapped around her back, his hand resting on her hip. “Yeah, she’s probably mad I didn’t mention the baby when she called last week.” Lydia replied. “Why didn’t you?” He asked. “We were going to meet up for lunch next week so I thought it be more fun to see her reaction than to tell her over the phone.” She smiled. “And was it?” He smirked. “Oh yeah. Her face in your office earlier couldn’t have been planned better.” Lydia chuckled. “How’d your work wife take it?” She asked. “I got a concerned look. I’m sure I’ll hear her opinion at some point next week.” He sighed.

“You’re having Barba’s baby?” Rollins blurted as she sat down at the table Lydia had been waiting at for lunch. “It’s good to see you too Amanda.” Lydia smiled. “When were you going to tell me?” Rollins questioned, ignoring her statement. “When we had lunch today.” Lydia replied. “How far along are you?” Rollins asked. “Six months.” Lydia answered. “That’s your whole relationship.” Rollins announced. “I’m aware.” Lydia said. “How’d Barba take that news?” Rollins inquired. “You remember the elevator footage and the fight we had in the precinct?” Lydia asked. “Yeah.” Rollins replied. “That well.” Lydia chuckled. “What are you having?” Rollins asked. “A baby.” Lydia smiled. “Yes, but you’re far enough along to know the gender.” Rollins said rolling her eyes. “Barba wants to be surprised.” Lydia said. “Why?” Rollins made a face. “Because he likes to torture himself.” Lydia replied. “Do you know?” Rollins inquired. “Yes. There’s no way I could wait that long to find out.” Lydia smiled. “So...” Rollins said lifting her eyebrows. “I’m not telling you before he finds out.” Lydia laughed. “You’re really going to make me wait until you give birth to find out if Barba’s going to have a little girl or... my god, there could be two of him.” Rollins quipped. “Would that really be so bad?” Lydia smiled.


	13. Chapter 13

Barba was watching Fin and Carisi interrogate the suspect from Liv’s office. “That was quick.” He quipped when Liv flipped off the sound as the suspect asked for a Lawyer. “What are you doing, Rafa?” She asked moving to sit at her desk. “Watching an interrogation.” He smirked, knowing what she was getting at. Liv didn’t say anything just gave him an unamused look. “I’m happy. That matters right?” He said. “She’s young.” Liv said, her eyes looking up at him as she tilted her head forward slightly. “I’m aware.” He smirked. “How far along is she?” Liv asked. “Six months.” He replied, not really concerned with how it looked. “What happens when the newness wears off and you two are stuck raising a kid together?” Liv countered. “What would you have me do? Sabotage a relationship I’m extremely happy in because we made a lapse in judgement at the beginning. We’ve been living together for three months. I enjoy having her in my... our apartment and I don’t like people in my home. She fits though. It’s still quiet. She gets her work done while I do mine. There’s a comfort in her presence that I can’t quite explain and while I would have planned bringing a baby into our home differently, I wouldn’t change a thing about how things have worked out.” Barba barked, his patience running thin. “I didn’t realize you two were that serious.” Liv replied running her fingers against her lips. “When I think about my home before she was there it seems empty.” The corners of his lips turned up slightly at an image of her curled up on his couch with her laptop. He hadn’t intentionally had her drop the file off at his place to get her alone, he had just wanted to leave work early, but once she was in his apartment he knew he didn’t want her to leave, so he had offered her a drink. “You’re happy?” Liv asked, a soft smile threatening. “I am.” He smirked.

“Lydia, hi.” Liv said as she and Barba exited her office. “Hi.” Lydia smiled as she sat on her old desk. “Were you waiting on Barba?” Liv asked, looking to Barba who looked just as confused as she did. “No, Amanda and I had planned on grabbing lunch while she showed me some of the stores she had recommended for baby stuff. We can do it another time if you’ve got a case.” Lydia replied, noticing how busy everyone looked. “No that’s ok. We’re waiting on the defense attorney. Just make sure she keeps her phone on, I’ll call if we need her back.” Liv stated as Rollins approached. “I will.” Rollins assured her as she gathered her purse. They passed Carisi and Fin on their way to the elevator. “Lydia’s pregnant?” She heard Carisi ask, turning just in time to catch an exaggerated eye roll from Barba before the elevator doors closed.

“What about this?” Rollins asked holding up a bright pink pillow that had the words daddy’s girl embroidered on it. Lydia scrunched up her face and shook her head. “I would go with purple over pink if it were a girl.” “So it’s a boy?” Rollins asked. “That’s not what I said.” Lydia smirked, running her fingers over a soft purple blanket. “You’re really going to make me wait even though I’m helping you shop?” Rollins pouted a pout that was so forced it made Lydia chuckle. “You don’t need to know the gender to help me shop. I’m perfectly capable of picking out clothes and bedding. I need help on what type of bottles, strollers, car seats, you know, other non gender specific things like that.” “What if I want to get you a gift?” Rollins questioned. “Blue, green, yellow, orange, white, black... all colors that work for both girls and boys. There’s also books and toys.” Lydia replied, an amused smile on her face as she quickly snapped a picture of some items she planned to come back for when Rollins wasn’t there. “Where are you storing all the girl or boy things so Barba doesn’t see them?” Rollins inquired as she held up a package of bottles. “I still have my apartment for the next few months so I’m storing everything there. Do you recommend those bottles?” Lydia said moving closer to look at them. “They’re the one I used.” She replied as her phone rang. Lydia compared a few different brands before dropping the ones Rollins held up in the cart. “Hey I gotta get back to the precinct. Do you want a ride home?” Rollins asked after she got off the phone. “That’s ok. I’m going to continue shopping.” Lydia replied. After Rollins left, Lydia made her way back over to the soft purple blanket she had looked at earlier, smiling as she put it in her cart with her other items.

“Did you really just dump your entire laundry basket into the washing machine?” Barba asked as he watched Lydia emerge from the laundry room just off the kitchen. “What? I use cold water.” She said dismissively as she made her way to sit next to him on the couch. “You don’t sort your clothes? The person who meticulously planned moving, just tosses everything in the washer?” He asked lifting an eyebrow. “I hate doing laundry. Why would I make it take longer than I have to?” She shrugged, inching herself against his side. “Remind me to never let you do my laundry.” He quipped, wrapping his arm around her. “I wasn’t planning on offering.” She smirked.

“Raf?” Lydia asked while she read his book along with him as they sat on the couch, enjoying just being pressing against him “Yes.” He hummed. “Where are we going to put the babies things?” She asked. “I rented a storage unit to move the furniture in the guest room to. I’ve never used it so I figure it wouldn’t be missed.” He replied as she got up to look at the room. “I’ve never even been in here.” She smiled as she opened the door. “Will it work?” He asked knowing she had been shopping. “It will. When can we move the furniture out?” She asked. “This weekend if you want.” He replied, shaking his head as she ran to get her tape measure. “Are you going to draw a scaled model of this room too?” He teased as she started measuring the walls. “How else will I know if the crib and dresser I’ve been looking at will fit.” She replied not really expecting an answer.

Barba had gone with Lydia to order the baby furniture the weekend after they had his guest room put in storage. She had finally decided on a walnut midcentury modern crib and matching dresser that was wider than it was tall, planning to put a changing pad on top of one half and diapers and what not on the other. Delivery was set up for the next month. “Where have you been keeping the stuff you’ve bought?” Barba asked as they left the store. “At my old apartment.” She smiled. “Can I see?” He asked as they walked down the crowded street, knowing they weren’t too far from her place. “That depends on if you want to remain in the dark about the gender.” She said as they reached the gelato place she had begged him to go to. 

He thought as she placed their order, hers a salted caramel, his banana and espresso. “What difference is a couple months going to make?” He said as she sat down. “What?” She asked taking a bite of her treat, not being on the same train of thought that he was. “You’re seven and a half months along. What difference does it make if I find out the gender today or in two months?” He questioned. “I never understood why you wanted to wait in the first place. How can you plan accordingly if you don’t know whether you’re buying pink dresses or blue overalls?” She asked more rhetorically than anything. “So show me.” He smiled. “Are you sure?” She asked, stealing a bite of his ice cream with her spoon. “Yes and this way I can make my mom happy too. She hates that I won’t let you tell her.” He smirked. “Amanda hates that I wont tell her too, but I’m kind of enjoying that.” Lydia grinned.

Her old apartment was only a few blocks from the gelato place. “Are you sure?” Lydia asked as they stood outside the door. “Positive.” He smiled. “Ok.” She turned her key and opened the door. Having typically been in a hurry when she dropped the things off, everything was kind of thrown on the couch or bed. Bags piled on top of each other, some spilling out with lots of purple popping out everywhere. “It’s a girl?” He asked, his eyes bouncing around the room. “Would you have preferred a boy?” She questioned unsure as to whether he was excited by the idea of a daughter or frightened. “Honestly... no. I like the idea of a having daughter.” He turned and wrapped his arm around her, “although having worked with SVU for as long as I have, she may hate how over protective I’m going to be.” “Do we have time for me to show you things as I organize it?” Lydia smiled as she pulled him further into the efficiency, “I keep meaning to but I never have time to stay.” “How about I call for my car and we get everything back in the bags, take them to our place and you can show me as we lay it out in her room.” He suggested.

Lydia pulled everything out of the bags one at a time to show him as she arranged the items in the babies room by category. “Look! Tiny bunny slippers!” She exclaimed, grinning like an idiot. “What function do those serve if she won’t be walking for a while?” Barba asked not being able to stop the smile from forming at her excitement. “None really. They’re just cute.” She replied, her goofy grin remaining. “You’re doing purple and white bunnies in her room?” He asked looking around at the multiple bunnies placed around the room. “I thought they were cute.” She shrugged. “What is that?” He asked, pointing to small, fairly worn wooden box that had fallen out of the bag she was digging through. “That’s my mother’s jewelry box. It has both my parents wedding bands and my mother’s engagement ring in it. I can’t even believe I left it at my apartment when I moved. I threw it in the bag when I saw it sitting on my dresser.” She replied absentmindedly rotating the box in her hands. He didn’t say anything just watched her. “She would have loved this, you know.” Lydia said, looking at him her eyes glossy. “I’m sorry they can’t be here.” He sighed, placing his hands on hers. “It’s ok.” She smiled, opening the box and pulling out a simple thin band, slipping it on her right ring finger, starting to spin it with her thumb. It was the same ring she had spun the morning she told him about her family. He looked inside when she handed him the box. There was a small square cut diamond engagement ring and a larger male wedding band inside. “She’s been gone over half my life now. She was only thirty seven.” Lydia said her voice distant. “Neither of us can die on her.” She said, startling him slightly as she looked up at him. “Lydia...” He whispered. “I’m serious. Promise me, neither of us will die.” She begged, just needing to be reassured. “I promise.” He said pulling her against his chest.

“How’s your dissertation coming?” He asked after he held her for a bit, changing the subject from her parents. “I’m done.” She smiled, using his shoulder to help her stand up. “Where are you going?” He inquired as she headed to the door. “Stay there, I’ll be right back.” She yelled as she made her way across the apartment. “You’re done?” He questioned when she returned. “Submitted it in yesterday.” She smiled, dropping a bound stack of papers in his lap. “There’s got to be a hundred pages here.” He said picking up her dissertation. “Hundred and thirty seven. I defend it next month. They’ll give me a date once the committee has read it.” She smiled, ignoring the uneasy feeling in her stomach at the thought of defending it. “I’ll start reading tomorrow to help you come up with arguments.” He said, flipping through the pages. “If you don’t have time it’s ok. Thomas has set up for me to observe a few other students as they defend theirs and he’s on the review committee so he’s helping prep me for questions.” She replied, knowing he had been really busy at work lately. “I want to read it.” He smiled kissing the top of her head.


	14. Chapter 14

“I didn’t know you knew so many big words.” Barba teased when he noticed Lydia watching him from the other end of the couch. “Jerk.” She huffed as she turned her attention back to the book she had been reading. He chuckled as he went back to reading her dissertation that he had somehow managed to make half way through despite his heavy workload over the last two weeks. Still every time he would jot something down on the legal pad he had next to him on the armrest her eyes would look up from the book. “That’s it, I’m going to the office.” He chuckled when he noticed she hadn’t turned a page for at least ten minutes. “Wait. No. I’ll be good and let you read in peace.” She pleaded as he stood. “We both know that’s not possible.” He smirked as he kissed the top of her head on his way towards his home office. She pouted but let him go.

“Ok.” He announced as he exited his office Sunday afternoon after spending Saturday evening and the better part of Sunday there. “You’re finished?” Lydia asked as she cut up veggies for the dinner she was making. “I did.” He smiled. “So...” She questioned. “I really didn’t know you were so smart.” He jested garnering a gentle elbow in his side from her as he tried to wrap his arms around her. “Seriously though... What did you think?” Lydia asked stopping her dinner prep to look at him. “It’s kind of amazing. I completely understand why you interned with SVU now. Your take on the effects of the ever changing rape culture on victims is the most accurate depiction of the current climate I have read.” Barba marveled. “I didn’t think you paid that much attention to the victims.” She replied playfully. “I’m hurt.” He replied pushing his bottom lip up. “I’m only teasing. I wouldn’t still be here if I didn’t see the amazing person hidden behind your snarky exterior.” Lydia smiled as she kissed his cheek. “I’ve got some possible arguments for your defense listed out on a legal pad for you. You can read through them later.” He stated as she returned to prepping for dinner. “What time is your mom going to be here?” She asked, tossing the carrots and broccoli in olive oil and seasoning. “Fifteen minutes.” He replied.

Lydia had barely placed the salmon filets in the oven when Barba let his mother in. “Hi mami.” Barba greeted her as she brush passed him to look at Lydia’s belly, barely getting a “hi Rafi” in passing. He chuckled as he shut the door and joined the two in the kitchen. “You’re eight months?” Lucia asked as she place her hand on Lydia’s belly hoping desperately to feel a kick. “Thirty two weeks yesterday.” Lydia smiled, moving Lucia’s hand to where she could feel her daughter pushing out with her foot. “Oh, I so wish Rafi would let you tell me the gender.” Lucia pouted. “Rafael Barba! You haven’t told your mom.” Lydia scolded as she pulled Lucia toward the babies room. “I was going to tonight.” He said in his defense as they crossed his living room. 

“Are you ready?” Lydia asked before she opened the door leading to the babies room. “Since Rafi told me you were pregnant.” Lucia replied, furrowing her brow slightly. Lydia chuckled as she opened the door. “Una nieta.” Lucia whispered as she entered the room Lydia had spent the last two weeks meticulously decorating. “A granddaughter.” Barba said when Lydia looked at him with a confused expression. “I’m beginning to wish I had taken Spanish instead of French as my foreign language requirements.” Lydia smirked. “Have you told Rollins?” Barba asked as he watched his mom look through the clothes Lydia had hanging in the closet. “I will, but right now I’m having more fun not to tell her.” Lydia smiled.

“That soon?” Barba heard Lydia asked as she spoke on the phone. He had decided to work from home that Monday afternoon, because he had discovered over the years that he wrote better opening statements without the constant interruptions that happened at the office. “Ok. No that will work. Better to get it over with. Yeah I can observe again tomorrow.” Lydia said. “They give you a date to defend you dissertation?” Barba asked as she hung up the phone. “This Friday.” Lydia answered, all the color draining from her face. “You’ll do great.” Barba assured her, pushing her hair behind her ear. “It’s just everything comes down to this and if they don’t except it then...” Lydia voice cracked. “Don’t think like that. Dr. Thomas has been reviewing it and having you make changes. You’ve got this.” Barba said. “You’re right. Thomas is on the review committee. He would have told me if there was something wrong with it.” Lydia replied, taking a deep breath, the color returning to her cheeks.

Friday approached faster than Lydia would have liked. She had made it through the comments and questions portions of her defense and was waiting in the hall while the committee deliberated. She was second guessing everything she had said when she felt her muscles tighten around her abdomen. She dismissed it and continued her obsessing having been experiencing Braxton Hicks for a few weeks now. “Lydia, you can come back in now.” Dr. Thomas notified her. She followed him back in the room and took her seat back in front of the committee trying not to let the discomfort from the latest Braxton Hicks contraction show on her face. “We have a few minor revisions we would like you to make but we are pleased to announce your defense was successful and the committee has passed your dissertation. Congratulations Dr. Coleman.” Dr. Dwyer, one of the other professors on the committee announced. Lydia looked blankly at the group sitting in front of her. Her mind had processed what had been said but all she could focus on was her heart racing. “Lydia?” Dr. Thomas said as he stood to approach her. She looked up but she couldn’t really focus aside from the fact that she felt she couldn’t breath. Not really knowing why she tried to stand and everything went black.

Thomas had managed to catch her before she fell as one of the other professors called for an ambulance. Not wanting her to be alone Thomas rode with her to the hospital. He hesitantly went through her purse to find her phone, apologizing as he used her thumb to unlock it, cursing himself slightly as he scrolled through her contacts that he hadn’t paid more attention to her boyfriends name. He had all but given up when an incoming call popped up on the screen. He didn’t know who Amanda Rollins was but he hoped she knew more about Lydia’s personal life than he did. “Hello.” He said as he answered. “Who is this?” Rollins responded. “I’m Lydia’s professor. She fainted... or something. Do you know the name of her boyfriend? I’d like to let him know she’s on the way to the hospital.” He replied, hoping this was a close enough friend to share that information with. “I’ll get him there. What hospital is she going to.” Rollins asked. “New York Presbyterian.” Dr. Thomas answered.

Rollins called Liv knowing Barba had just started opening arguments for the their latest case. She kept calling until Liv finally snuck out of the courtroom to answer. “This had better be an emergency.” Liv said as she answered the phone. “Somethings happened with Lydia. I’m going to the hospital to see if I can stay with her. Can you get Barba?” Rollins asked. “What hospital?” Liv asked. “New York Presbyterian.” Rollins answered. Liv waited in the back of the courtroom until the defense had finished their opening statement, before making her way to speak to Barba. “I don’t know the details but Lydia is being taken to the hospital.” Liv whispered to Barba as he leaned over the railing separating them. 

“Can we approach?” Barba asked, addressing the judge. Ross, the defense attorney gave him a curious look but followed as the judge motioned them to the bench. “I need to ask for a recess until Monday. A family emergency.” He spoke, his voice faltering slightly as he tried to stay composed. “The defense has no objection.” Ross stated noticing the concern on Barba’s face. The judge nodded. “Prosecution will begin Monday nine am, court is adjourned until then.” Carisi and Fin had joined Liv by the time he approached her. “Carisi can you take that to my office?” He asked gesturing to the files on the prosecution desk. “I’ll help.” Fin offered as Carisi started to gather the papers and Liv guided Barba to her car.

“Hi, I’m Amanda Rollins.” Rollins said as she saw Thomas walk in with Lydia, who was conscious but on a gurney. “I’m Dr. Randall Thomas.” Thomas said introducing himself. “You didn’t call Rafael did you?” Lydia whined. “I didn’t. I called Liv who informed Barba.” Rollins smiled, glad to see Lydia seemed like herself. “I just fainted. The trial started today. It could have waited.” Lydia said dismissively as they continued to wheel her to the nurses station. “The doctor tell you that.” Rollins deadpanned as Lydia rolled her eyes. “Only family passed this point.” The nurse said as they reached the double doors. “She’s my sister.” Lydia and Rollins said at the same time causing them both to chuckle. The nurse handed Rollins some paperwork as they continued to an intake room. “Make sure Barba’s down as my emergency contact. I don’t want him having issues getting back here since you interrupted his trial.” Lydia said.

A nurse took Lydia’s vitals and made a concerned face as she took her blood pressure a second time. The pulse oximeter was showing her heart rate bouncing between one thirty and one fifty confirming that she still felt her heart racing. The nurse then tried to find the baby’s heartbeat but wasn’t having much luck. Lydia’s heart rate jumped even higher as she searched. “Please don’t panic, I promise it’s me. I’ve never been good at locating the heartbeat. I’ll get a different nurse in here immediately and call for the on call obstetrician.” The nurse said before hurrying out of the room. A different nurse was in within a few minutes and had the baby’s heartbeat up in no time allowing Lydia to breath again, though her heart rate remained in the one thirties.

“Lydia, hi.” Dr. Owens said as she entered the room. “Dr. Owens. That’s convenient that you’re on call.” Lydia smiled. “Where’s Rafael?” Dr. Owens asked as she glanced at Rollins. “He was in court but is on his way. This is my friend Amanda.” Lydia replied. Dr. Owens nodded and looked over her chart. “Your blood pressure is one thirty three over eighty nine but I’m most concerned about the bottom number and you’re pulse is higher than I’d like.” Dr. Owens informed her. “What about the baby?” Lydia asked. Dr. Owens pulled up the baby’s heartbeat. “She sounds great.” Dr. Owens smiled. “She?” Rollins questioned, lifting her brow. “Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t think you and Rafael were keeping the gender secret anymore.” Dr. Owens apologized. “We’re not I just hadn’t told Amanda yet.” Lydia grinned. 

Rollins let Barba in when he knocked on the door. “Are you ok?” Barba asked as he rushed passed Rollins to Lydia’s side. “I’m ok.” Lydia replied as he rested his forehead against hers. “She’s even better now.” Dr. Owens smiled as she noticed Lydia’s heart rate fall into the nineties. “What happened?” Barba asked. “I’m not sure. I defended my dissertation and was sitting in the hall waiting for their answer. I felt some Braxton Hicks but I ignored them being more concerned with over analyzing my answers to their questions. Then Thomas had me come back in. Dr. Dwyer told me they had a few revisions but had excepted my dissertation and then I panicked. My whole body started shaking, it felt like I couldn’t breath, and then everything went black.” Lydia replied. “Shouldn’t having the thing you were dreading most being over with, be a relief?” Barba teased. “You would think.” Lydia replied. 

“I’m want to check and make sure you haven’t started dilating since you mentioned having some contractions.” Dr. Owens said. Rollins waited outside while Dr. Owens did her exam and Barba let her back in once Lydia was dressed again. “You’re not dilated, which is good. I am concerned about your blood pressure and heart rate.” Dr. Owens said. “Ok.” Lydia replied. “I know you’re set up to see me every two weeks but I want to monitor your blood pressure weekly. Also I need you to take it easy. You can do your revisions but that’s it. No lifting, don’t work on the baby’s room, sit on the couch or in bed and read or watch movies.” Dr. Owens instructed. “You’re putting me on bed rest?” Lydia questioned. “A modified bed rest at least until your next appointment.” Dr. Owens replied. “What about sex?” Lydia asked. “Really?” Rollins blurted. “What? We’ve clearly done it.” Lydia said, gesturing to her belly. Rollins rolled her eyes as Dr. Owens answered. “Lets refrain for now. We can discuss it again at your next visit.”

“I can see if another ADA can take over this trial.” Barba offered when he got Lydia home. “Why, so you can watch me sit on the couch?” Lydia huffed. “I just want to know you’re ok.” He said. “I’ll be fine. I know the number to nine one one and your car service and Amanda and you. I’ll be fine.” She smiled. “What if you pass out again? How would you call for help, then?” He questioned. Lydia was quiet. She didn’t really think that would happen again, that it had to do with the stress from defending her dissertation but she knew he wouldn’t except that. “I’ll see if my mom can stay with you.” He stated, not really waiting on a response as he started to call her. “Great.” Lydia muttered under her breath. She loved his mom but knew she would be even more overprotective than Barba.

Lydia woke up while Barba was getting ready for work. She pulled his pillows plus a few extra pillows from the closet to the bed to make it as comfortable as possible so she could sit leaned back watching movies on her laptop. Barba had exited the bathroom fully dressed when there was a knock at the front door. “I’ll get it.” Lydia offered but Barba stopped her. “I got it.” She rolled her eyes and gathered a couple books since she figured Lucia wouldn’t be letting her leave the bed much. “What are you doing out of bed?” Lucia asked as she entered the bedroom. “Just getting everything situated so I can sit comfortably all day.” Lydia grumbled. “When is your next doctors appointment? I can take you if needed.” Lucia offered. “It’s Wednesday and depending on how court goes that would be a great help.” Rafael replied. Lydia climbed in bed and watched as they discussed what she could and couldn’t do, rolling her eyes when Rafael accused her of trying to do more than she should.

“What are you doing out of bed?” Lucia asked as Lydia made her way to the kitchen. “I was going to see what we had to eat.” Lydia replied. “I can get it for you. What do you want?” Lucia asked trying to shoo her back to bed. “I’m not sure that’s why I was going to look, besides if you want me to eat in bed, you’re the one who’ll have to explain the crumbs to Rafael.” Lydia chuckled. “Hmmm. Ok but you sit and I’ll show you your options and make it for you.” Lucia insisted. “What are you knitting?” Lydia asked as she ate the peanut butter sandwich Lucia had made her. “Booties and hats.” Lucia replied. “My mom could knit, I never learned though.” Lydia sighed. “I can teach you. It’d give you something to do while you watched movies.” Lucia offered. “That looks complicated.” Lydia said gesturing to the booties Lucia was working on. “I’ll teach you the basics. You can make a baby blanket with the basics.” Lucia said. “Ok.” Lydia smiled. “I’ll pick up some yarn and knitting needles for you on the way home and teach you tomorrow.” Lucia replied.

The next day Lucia showed up with a few bags full of yarn and other knitting supplies. Lydia had picked the purple, gray, and white yarn to make the blanket out of and Lucia showed her how to cast on. “How long is this going to be?” Lydia asked as she held up the knitting needle to show how much she had crammed on to it. “That’s probably long enough, although its hard to tell until you get enough rows done that you can see it stretched out.” Lucia said. “Ok, now what?” Lydia asked not sure how to start a second row. Lucia showed her and she had it figured out by the time she reached the third row. The knitting helped keep her mind occupied while she had movies play as background noise when she wasn’t chatting with Lucia.

“You’re knitting? Like a little old lady.” Barba chuckled when he got home from work. “You better watch it.” Lucia scolded from the living room. “I’m making a baby blanket and I’m actually enjoying it. You try sitting and doing nothing all day.” Lydia replied. “Well hopefully you get some more freedom tomorrow.” Barba smirked. “Can you go?” Lydia asked. “I’m going to try but the way this trial is going I kind of doubt it.” He sighed. 

Lucia waited in the waiting room for Lydia during her appointment. “So I’m I still restricted to bed rest?” Lydia asked, hoping to get some freedom back. “I’m afraid so. Your blood pressure is better but still on the high side and I don’t want you developing preeclampsia or going into early labor. You’re almost thirty four weeks and while your baby is viable if you were to go into labor, I’d still prefer to see you get closer to thirty seven weeks.” Dr. Owens informed her. “Ok but can I at least have a doctors note that says I don’t need constant supervision. Neither Rafael nor his mom will let me out of their sight.” Lydia said shaking her head. “You really think that would help?” Dr. Owens asked, chuckling when Lydia sighed, “No.”


	15. Chapter 15

“Hi, Barba.” Rollins said as she entered the apartment. “Thanks for doing this. My mom had to get some things done and...” “Summations are today.” Rollins interrupted. “Liv said it’d be ok but to keep your phone on.” Barba said. “Yes but only because she wants you focused on the trial and not worried about Lydia.” Rollins grinned. “You’re ok with this?” Barba questioned. “Hmmm... Let’s see a day of work spent gossiping about you with my friend...” Rollins teased as Barba rolled his eyes. “Where is she anyway?” Rollins asked. “Still asleep,” Barba smirked, “make yourself at home.” He handed her the remote before heading out to work.

Rollins got up when she heard Lydia stir in the bedroom. “Are you supposed to be out of bed?” Rollins asked. “I’m not confined to the bed.” Lydia rolled her eyes as she made her way to the kitchen to find food. “My god you’re huge.” Rollins chuckled as Lydia waddled by her. “I think I want Lucia back.” Lydia quipped as she got a pan to make eggs in, truthfully thankful to have someone around that would let her do something as simple as make her own breakfast. “How has it been with Barba’s mom taking care of you?” Rollins asked. “Actually it’s been pretty nice, but don’t tell Rafael that. I plan on using this as leverage at some point later on.” Lydia grinned. 

They were sitting on the couch, the television on as background noise as they talked. “Have you picked a name yet?” Rollins asked. “No. He’s been so busy we haven’t really had time to discuss it.” Lydia sighed. “What names do you like?” Rollins asked. “I like Teresa, Amelia, Georgina, or Evelyn.” Lydia replied. “I like the way Evelyn Barba sounds the best. Is the baby taking his last name?” Rollins questioned. “I figure it’s the least I can do since I plan to remain Dr. Coleman if we ever decide to get married.” Lydia smirked. “Then Evelyn is my favorite.” Rollins affirmed. “It’s mine too.” Lydia smiled.

“What?” Lydia asked as Rollins looked at her phone. “Nothing.” Rollins replied as she typed a response. “Let’s find something mindless to watch instead of the news.” Rollins suggested as she reached for the remote but she wasn’t fast enough. “The Manhattan District Courthouse is under lockdown as an armed gunman holds a courtroom hostage.” A reporter standing outside the courthouse said. “It’s a different courtroom, not Barba’s. He’s safe. Liv just texted that they have the doors to the courtroom locked and are staying put until they get the go ahead to move people out.” Rollins informed her. “But he’s still inside?” Lydia asked. “He is.” Rollins sighed.

“I told Liv to make sure Rollins turned the news off.” Was the first thing Barba said when he answered the phone. “Do you know how mad I would have been at you for not letting Amanda tell me if something happened?” Lydia barked. “We’re safe. It’s not even in a courtroom close by. The police are starting to move people out of our courtroom now.” Barba assured her. “Can I keep you on the phone so I know you’re ok?” She asked. “Yes, but when they move us down the hall I may not be able to respond if you say something.” He replied. “That’s fine. Just give me a heads up.” Lydia said. 

The police secured the defendant first and then removed the jury. The extraneous people watching were next followed by the judge, attorneys, and detectives. “Ok we’re out.” Barba said once they were a safe distance from the courthouse. “Can you come home?” Lydia asked a little more desperately than she intended to. “Let me see what I can do.” Barba replied, a smile on his face she couldn’t see through the phone. Lydia and Rollins continued to watch the scene unfold on the news. “Are you ok?” Rollins asked. “Yeah. I’ll be better when he’s home.” Lydia sighed. 

Barba walked in the apartment a little less than an hour later and immediately went to sit next to her on the couch, wrapping his arms around her. “How do you feel?” He asked as he removed a blood pressure monitor he had just purchased from its box. “Raf... I’m fine.” Lydia insisted, rolling her eyes as he wrapped the cuff around her arm. “I’ll believe you after we take your blood pressure.” He replied, causing Rollins to chuckle. “What is it?” Rollins asked. “One twenty two over seventy nine.” He answered. “See, almost perfect.” Lydia smiled. “I’m taking it again.” Barba said as he punched the button. Lydia looked at Rollins and shook her head. “I’m going to see if Liv needs me for anything, since you’re home now.” Rollins said, gathering her things to leave. “It’s only higher now because you’re driving me crazy.” She heard Lydia say as she exited the apartment.

“Did you finish in court or do you have to go back tomorrow?” Lydia asked after he finally stopped taking her blood pressure. “I got through my closing argument but the defense didn’t get to theirs so that will most likely happen tomorrow.” He replied. “You’re done though?” She questioned. “Nothing else I can do now.” He smiled, setting the monitor on the coffee table. “Have you thought about baby names?” She asked. “A little.” He smirked. “Really like what?” She asked leaning into his side. “Elizabeth... Katherine... Teresa...” He replied. “Teresa?” She questioned, turning her head slightly to look at him. “Yeah, what about you?” He asked. “I like Teresa...” she smiled at him, “Amelia, Georgina, and Evelyn.” “I hadn’t thought about Evelyn.” He smiled. “What do you think of Evelyn?” She asked. “Evelyn Barba... not a lot of names go that well with Barba.” He replied. “I know.” She smiled. “Lydia Barba sounds nice too you know.” He smirked. “I’ve worked hard to become Dr. Coleman.” She replied, giving him a look to ensure he knew she was serious about keeping her name. “I know, but she can be a Barba right?” He questioned placing his hand on her belly. “Well Evelyn Teresa Barba sounds much better than Evelyn Teresa Coleman so I guess.” She teased. “Evelyn then?” He asked. “It was my moms name.” Lydia smiled curling into him even more. “Teresa too?” He inquired, pulling her tighter to him. “No. I just like Teresa.” She replied.

“Ok Lydia, your baby is officially full term and your blood pressure seems to be consistently normal.” Dr. Owens said. “So no more bed rest?” Lydia questioned. “Nope, no more bed rest, but ease back into things.” Dr. Owens replied. “You heard that Raf?” Lydia asked, lifting her eyebrows at him. “I did. I also heard the ease back into things part.” He smirked. “Does that mean we can have sex again?” Lydia asked as Barba rolled his eyes. “Yes. Just know that, although not scientifically proven, there is some evidence to support that sex can induce labor in late pregnancy, so keep that in mind if you’re not quite ready for sleepless nights yet.” Dr. Owens replied.

“Lydia.” Barba spoke between kisses, as she basically attacked him once inside their apartment. “Maybe we wait until after your graduation this weekend, just in case you go into labor.” Barba continued, forcing her to stop and look at him. “It’s been months.” Lydia whined. “One month.” Barba corrected with a small smirk. “Feels longer.” Lydia huffed. “What’s one more week?” He smiled pulling her to him. “I’ll take my chances. Besides she said it wasn’t scientifically proven just that there was some correlation.” She smiled pressing her lips back to his as she started to unbutton his shirt. “Lydia...” He protested, stopping her again. “What if I go into labor anyway and then we have to wait another six weeks.” Lydia argued. “Six weeks?” He questioned. “Yeah, that’s the fun stuff I’ve been reading. That’s how long it takes for that area to heal.” Lydia replied. “Thanks for that.” Barba sighed. “Do you really want to wait another month and a half?” She asked. “No. You sure you ok if something happens and you miss your graduation?” He questioned, moving his hands to her face. “Getting out of walking across a stage in front of people. I’m fine with missing it. I only decided to do it because you got so excited about it.” She smiled pressing her lips to his again.

They had each other’s clothes off by the time they made it to the bedroom. His tongue making contact with her the moment her head hit the pillow. “My god I’ve missed this.” She moaned as she gripped his hair, her back arching off the bed. He gave her a few extra licks when she finished bucking against him before climbing on top of her. He giggled when he realized her belly was in the way. “What?” She asked, curious as to what he found so humorous. “I don’t think this positions going to work.” He smiled. Lydia chuckled as she realized he was right and pulled herself to her hands and knees. “Better?” She asked as she looked back over her shoulder at him. “Much.” He smiled as he pushed in from behind. She moaned as he thrust into her, taking his time even after he felt her tighten around him. Lydia rested her head against the mattress while he continued his steady pace. “Fuck Barba.” She moaned against the bed as she came again, eliciting a small smirk from him at her use of his last name. He pumped faster, grunting his release and pulling her next to him on the bed. “How do you feel?” He asked. “Fantastic.” She panted, turning to look at him. “No contractions?” He asked as he grinned. “Nope.” She smiled, draping her arm across him as he pulled the covers over them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should have the next chapter in this one up soon... hopefully.


	16. Chapter 16

“Are you in a hurry to have this baby or just trying to get out of walking at graduation?” Barba chuckled as Lydia pulled him into their bedroom when he got home from work on Friday. “Can’t I just want you?” She smiled as she loosened his tie, having already unbuttoned his vest. Her hands reached to unfasten his slacks as he took over the removal of his tie, slipping his vest off and letting both fall to the floor when she, not so gracefully made it to her knees. He gave a throaty breath when she took him in her mouth without bothering to remove anymore clothing. His hands ran through her hair, to the back of her head as he ever so gently pushed himself deeper down her throat. Humming softly against him she looked up, making eye contact as he moaned. She watched as he closed his eyes and bit his lip as he exhaled, before removing himself from her.

“On the bed.” He ordered and she happily complied, inching backwards as he reached under the pink sun dress she had worn to her cohorts celebratory lunch earlier that day. He slid her panties off before climbing on the bed after her, burying his face between her legs as he listened to her moan. When she gripped his hair, a signal he had learned over their short time together that meant she was close, he inserted two fingers and replaced his tongue with his thumb so he could watch her. Lifting his head slightly, causing her to move her hand from his hair to the bedspread, gripping it tightly as her back arch and her head tilted back, soft moans escaping her as she jerked against his hand. When he saw her hand start to move toward his he lessened his touch and removed his fingers.

“Flip over.” He breathed. Lydia complied, pulling herself to her knees and propping herself up for him. Barba pushed the skirt of her dress out of the way as he pushed into her still wearing the majority of his own clothing. Lydia looked over her shoulder and the sight of him almost sent her over the edge. His hair slightly disheveled from where she had her hands in it earlier, the dress shirt still buttoned, sleeves rolled up as his hands gripped her hips, his suspenders still in place. She made a mental note to keep him dressed more often as she watched him pound into her. It didn’t take long for her as she continued to look at him. She pressed her head against the pillow as she moaned, continuing to hold the mental image of him in her mind as she came. He had noticed her watching him and grunted a few last thrust shortly after, smirking slightly as he held himself inside her while he caught his breath.

He adjusted his underwear back over himself as they laid on the bed. “You do know I’m going to keep you dressed more often now.” She smiled as she rested her head on his chest. “I knew you only liked me for my clothes.” He teased. “Who can resist your end of the day look, with your hair not quite perfect, your tie loosened, sleeves rolled up, the jacket and vest discarded for the day,” she pulled her self up to his lips before continuing, “it’s one of the main reasons this whole thing started. You’re just lucky you hadn’t changed out of your work clothes when I dropped that file off.” “We both know you enjoyed the banter just as much as I did.” He smirked pulling his arm tighter around her. “I’ll never admit that.” She chuckled as she thought about the different annoyed looks that he, well technically, still gave her.

The next morning was chaotic as she tried to dismiss her nerves while she attempted to get ready. “You do realize you don’t have to say anything. You just walk across the stage, shake a hand and then your done. You’ve done this twice before.” Barba teased as she nervously moved about the apartment. “No I haven’t.” She replied as she handed him a necklace. “You didn’t attend your undergrad or grad school graduations?” He asked as he fastened the clasp. “No.” She said as she tried to figure out all the pieces of her cap and gown. “Not even your high school graduation?” He asked helping her drape the dark blue doctoral hood over her shoulders. “I was preoccupied with planning my fathers funeral.” She replied rushing to grab a small purse slipping the strap over her shoulder under the gown and clasping the strap back to the purse, pleased that you couldn’t tell it was there under the gown. 

Barba wanted to ask more about her dad realizing from her latest comment that the tenth anniversary of his death was somewhere around this time of year, but he didn’t want to bring it up considering she was already nervous. Instead he asked about her birthday remembering she had mentioned he died a month before her eighteenth birthday. “Your birthday’s next month?” “June twenty first.” She smiled as they sat in the back of his town car, taking his hand in hers. “When is yours?” She asked. “October twenty fourth.” He smirked knowing her next statement. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Lydia pouted. “If I recall you stormed out of my apartment after I stuck my foot in my mouth.” He smiled placing his hand on her stomach. “Well that was a happy birthday.” She chuckled. “Best birthday present I didn’t know I wanted.” He smirked as he leaned in to kiss her.

“Where’s Lydia’s family?” Liv asked when Barba joined them in the audience after dropping Lydia off. “They’re not able to make it.” He replied, waving at his mother who was scanning the seats looking for him. “Does Lydia know how many people are out here?” Rollins asked as she looked around. “She’ll be ok, she doesn’t have to speak or anything.” Carisi said. “Yeah, but there’s a lot of people.” Fin piped in, only adding to Barba’s concern. He hadn’t realized how large the ceremony was going to be. The space between the buildings were filled with chairs and people, there had to be thousands and he knew this would stress her more than he originally thought it would.

Lydia focused on her breathing as she sat with the other graduates, really wishing they weren’t sitting where she could see the audience. “Less than five minutes... less than five minutes...” she kept whispering to herself as she barely listened to the commencement speaker. She had pretty much stopped paying attention when she noticed her row stand. Standing with them, feeling almost on autopilot, she followed, taking a deep breath as she walked across the stage when they called her name. “Congrats.” Dr. Thomas smiled at her as she shook his hand. “Thanks.” Lydia nodded as she continued her path off the stage following her row back to her seat. Once seated again she relaxed and could actually listen to the remainder of the ceremony.

She pulled her phone out of her purse to entertain herself as the rest of the graduates were called. Her stomach muscles tightened so she decided to test the contraction timer app she had downloaded. It lasted for maybe ten seconds and she assumed it was another Braxton Hicks, she just hadn’t really messed with the app and wanted to see how it worked. A short while later she felt another one and timed it as well, still around ten seconds but she was pleased to see that the app told her that there had been thirty minutes between this and the last one. She stood to sing the school song when she felt another one, which kind of surprised her since the Braxton Hicks usually stopped if she stood or moved around. Since she still had her phone out she timed it as well, fifteen seconds still thirty minutes apart. They were seated again when the next one came, back to ten seconds but twenty five minutes apart. “How much longer is this thing?” She muttered to the random girl sitting next to her. “I think it’s almost over.” The girl chuckled. 

When the ceremony ended, she made her way to where she had prearranged to meet everyone. Another contraction hit while she was waiting for them, fifteen seconds causing her to grimace slightly but it had been forty five minutes since the last one. Lydia figured she was in labor but decided she’d keep tracking the contractions and go ahead with lunch as planned. Dr. Owens had told her not to go to the hospital until they lasted a minute and were less than five minutes apart and who knew how long that would take. “Hey.” She called as she saw them approaching. “That took longer than I expected.” Rollins half complained once Lydia was in earshot. “You and me both.” Lydia commiserated.

Barba had made reservations at a nice restaurant not too far from Columbia for a late lunch after the ceremony. Lydia was happy to have the cap and gown off after sitting in the warm sun for so long. The blue dress she was wearing gave her gray eyes a blueish tint. Barba was sitting to her left, Lucia on his other side, Rollins sitting to her right, with Liv, Carisi, and Fin completing the circular table. “What are you doing?” Rollins asked as Lydia quickly closed her phone screen. “Nothing.” She said fighting back a grimace as another contraction hit. “Are you timing contractions?” Rollins whispered. “Yes, but they are still really spread out and only last for ten to fifteen seconds and if you freak Rafael out I will hold it against you forever.” Lydia whispered back. “Alright.” Rollins grinned gesturing for her to continue with her timing. 

“When do you get your diploma?” Carisi asked. “I think they mail them next week.” Lydia smiled as she picked at her food. She wanted to eat but the more she thought about giving birth in the next twelve to twenty four hours, the less hungry she became. “You’ve barely touched your food.” Barba said as he noticed. “I’ll get it to go. I think I’m still a little anxious from earlier.” Lydia smiled as Rollins rolled her eyes. “You do know he’s going to find out.” Rollins whispered when Barba turned his attention back to his mom. “I’ll tell him when we get back to the apartment. Let him enjoy lunch.” Lydia replied, smiling at how happy he looked.

Barba held Lydia’s hand as they rode the elevator up to the apartment. “Are you ok?” He asked as he felt her grip tighten. “Yeah.” She tried to smile as she bent over slightly. He had started to panic when the contraction ended and she stood again taking a deep breath. “That one was more painful than the others.” She smiled tying to play off the fact that she hadn’t told him she was having contractions. “The others?” He snapped. “Relax, they’re not anywhere near where they need to be to go to the hospital.” Lydia replied as she dragged him by his hand down the hall to the apartment. 

Once inside Barba frantically moved about the apartment making sure her hospital bag was packed and by the door and the apartment was in order for when they returned. Lydia was curious as to what he’d find to do next after completing one task but he continuously seemed to find something. “Rafael? Could you sit down? You’re making me nervous.” Lydia chuckled. “No. Too many things to do.” He muttered as he past her on the way to their bedroom. She gripped the armrest of the couch as she timed another contraction, trying not to make her pain audible as Barba did whatever he was doing in their bedroom. They were getting longer and she was definitely feeling them more, averaging thirty to forty seconds and seven to ten minutes apart.

Barba was standing by the door, looking at the things he had placed there and mouthing to himself as he mentally checked things off a list. “You have everything you think you’ll need?” Lydia teased as she watched him. “Funny.” He deadpanned, glaring at her slightly. “Seriously though, is that everything?” She asked. “I think so.” He sighed. “Good, because I think it’s time.” She said as she stood, Barba rushing to her side as she did. “They’re five minutes apart?” He asked as he walked her toward the door. “Close enough, but they’re really starting to hurt now and I’ve never been one to even consider a home birth.” She said as he placed the bag over his shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me they were hurting?” He asked as they got on the elevator. “Oh, honey,” she said placing her hand on his cheek, “you were freaked out enough.”

“Fuck.” She groaned as she gripped the railing of the hospital bed, pulling her legs up as she attempted to breath through another contraction. Barba stood next to the bed not really knowing what to do with himself. After the contraction was over the nurse, Anna, checked to see how dilated she was. “You’re at five centimeters.” Anna said when she was done. “That’s only half way?” Lydia blurted causing the nurse to fight back a chuckle. “Yes.” “It only get’s more painful from here?” Lydia questioned. “Sorry to say, but yes.” Anna replied. “I want the epidural then.” Lydia groaned as another contraction hit. “Are you sure?” Barba asked after the contraction ended. “I tell you what, when you push a small watermelon out of your vagina, we can have a conversation about pain management.” Lydia countered. “Ok.” He nodded, extremely thankful not be the one delivering their child. 

The anesthesiologist made Barba sit in a chair on the other side of the bed when he started prepping to administer the epidural. “But...” Barba said as he started to get back up, but Anna made him sit back down. “It’s so you don’t fall if you pass out.” Lydia said as she move to sit on the edge of the bed, Anna holding her in place so she didn’t move while the anesthesiologist placed the epidural. Barba watched as Lydia grimaced. “Almost through, Lydia.” The doctor said as he finished his work. “Alright.” Anna said when he was through, helping Lydia lay back down. “How long does it take?” Lydia asked as she felt another contraction. “Maybe five minutes.” Anna replied as she watched the monitor. Barba joined her back at her side once Anna told him he could get up. “That looked painful.” He said. “Not nearly as bad as the contraction.” Lydia sighed as she looked up at him. “Hey, you know I love you, right?” Barba smiled as he took her hand in his. “I do know,” she grinned squeezing his hand, “I love you too.” 

“Ok, you’re fully dilated. Are you ready to push?” Anna asked as she prepped the bed. “Is Dr. Owens here?” Lydia asked. “Dr. Bradford is on call today.” Anna replied. “Ok, where is he or she?” Lydia questioned. “You still need to get a little further along, then I’ll call for him.” Anna smiled as she began to coach Lydia on when to push. “I swear to god, Barba, if you knock me up again...” Her threat turned into more of a groan as Anna told her to push again. “So now I’m Barba?” He smirked when Anna let her relax again. “I still kind of hate you.” Lydia panted trying to smile before Anna made her push again. “Ok, you can relax. You’re just about there, I’ll call for Dr. Bradford now.” Anna said.

“Lydia, are you ready to have this baby.” Dr. Bradford said as he entered the room followed by a few more nurses, two of which were pulling a table full of medical instruments. “Why do I feel like I’m suddenly in an episode of Criminal Minds.” Lydia quipped to Barba, as she gestured to the table. “Don’t worry, most of it won’t be used.” Dr. Bradford assured her. “Then why bring it?” Lydia asked. “It’s better to have and not need than need and not have.” He replied as they got everything set up. “You ready to push again?” He asked. Lydia took a deep breath and began pushing when he told her too. It wasn’t long before Dr. Bradford was handing Lydia their daughter.

“You ok?” Barba asked when it was finally just the three of them. “I’m good.” She smiled as she looked down at the little girl in her arms. “She’s cute, isn’t she?” He smiled. “I think so. You want to hold her?” Lydia asked as he started for the chair. “Sure.” He smiled, turning to take the tiny baby from her. His hold was slightly awkward at first but it wasn’t long before he looked comfortable as he move to the chair to sit. “When are you going to call your mom?” Lydia asked as she watched them. “After we get a little rest.” He whispered looking down at Evelyn. “Ok. I’ll tell Amanda she can come by after your mothers gotten to see her.” Lydia smiled picking up her phone. “You told Rollins already?” He questioned. “She knew I was in labor at lunch yesterday.” Lydia smirked. “Remind me to be annoyed with her for not telling me.” He smiled turning his attention back to Evelyn.


	17. Chapter 17

“Hey Liv.” Barba greeted as he opened the door letting her in the apartment. “Hi Rafael. Oh my, she’s adorable.” Liv smiled as she made her way over to the tiny baby who was quietly laying in her swing. “We think so.” He beamed. “Can I?” Liv asked gesturing to hold Evelyn. “You can.” He smiled as he watched Liv lean down and pick her up. “She’s so tiny. Noah was never this tiny. Well, I guess he was, but not while I had him.” Liv said as she smiled at Evelyn. “Hi Liv.” Lydia yawned as she entered the kitchen in her pajamas. “You’re supposed to be sleeping.” Barba scolded. “I was sleeping. Now I’m awake.” Lydia smiled as she got a glass of water. “I didn’t wake you did I?” Liv asked moving to join them in the kitchen. “No I woke up before you knocked I just hadn’t gotten out of bed yet.” Lydia smiled. “So what do you need help with for tonight?” Liv asked since in addition to seeing Evelyn she had come over early to help them get ready for the dinner they had planned. Barba had hated the idea of having everyone in their home at first but it did sound easier to have everyone over to meet Evelyn at once than to keep having people pop by. “Actually, if you could keep doing what you’re doing, I could shower and Raf could clean.” Lydia replied. “With pleasure.” Liv smiled as she made her way to the couch to sit with Evelyn.

“Don’t take this the wrong way but I really can’t believe you’re a father.” Liv chuckled as she watched Barba moved about the living room picking up burp cloths and toys, straightening the areas they had meaning to get to as he went. “Truth be told, me either.” He smirked. “You’re happy though?” She asked. “I really didn’t think I could be this happy.” He replied, the lack of stress normally present on his face speaking volumes. “Barba has a little family.” Liv smiled as Evelyn started to fall asleep in her arms. “Now if only I could convince her to marry me.” Barba sighed as he helped Liv get Evelyn back in her swing to sleep. “Lydia doesn’t want to get married?” Liv pried since he brought it up. “It’s not that she doesn’t want to, she just doesn’t want to get married for the wrong reasons. She thinks it takes years to get to know someone well enough to marry them.” Barba replied. “And what do you think?” Liv asked. “That when you know, you know.” He replied the corners of his lips pulling up slightly. “How long have you known?” Liv asked, smiling with her eyes. “Since the first morning I woke up next to her.” He smirked thinking back to how they had overslept and despite her trying to rush him out to get ready for work she had told him not to leave before she could get a kiss goodbye. “Which was...?” Liv inquired. “Roughly ten months ago.” He grinned, looking down at the one month old sleeping in her swing. “I kind of have to agree with Lydia on this. There’s no rush and it’s not like she’s going anywhere.” Liv said as she helped Barba get the table set up. “I know but it would be a lot harder for her to leave if we were married.” He smirked. “Do you want her to stay because she’s stuck or because she chooses to?” Liv asked lifting her brow knowingly. “Because she wants to.” He grumbled, looking slightly annoyed that she would just take his side. “You know it’s better in the long run this way.” Liv smiled. “I do but that doesn’t mean I can’t be irrational at times.” He huffed causing Liv to chuckle.

“Oh I almost forgot.” Liv said as she pulled a bottle of wine out of her oversized purse when Lydia emerged from the bedroom dressed and ready for people to arrive. “Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had wine?” Lydia replied taking it from her and setting it on the counter. “Haven’t been up for drinking much since Evelyn was born?” Liv teased. “There’s something about the multiple night feedings and baby screams that dampen ones desire to drink. I’ll make an exception today though.” Lydia smiled. “You look nice.” Barba said giving Lydia a short kiss after taking in her dress. This was the first time since Evelyn was born he had seen her wear something besides pajamas. He hadn’t really put on anything but sweats or pajamas either, what was the point, there was constant spit up and he still swears he was peed on, but it was nice to see her dressed up again. “Thanks.” She smirked.

As if on cue Evelyn woke as soon as Lydia sat down. Liv picked her up but she didn’t stop crying. “She’s hungry,” Lydia said taking Evelyn from her, “I’ll bring her back after I feed her.” Lydia took Evelyn to the bedroom to nurse. She could have fed her a bottle of what she had pumped but since she planned on drinking some she was saving it. “Where’s Lydia and Barba?” Rollins asked when Liv let her in. “Barba’s calling about dinner and Lydia’s nursing.” Liv replied. She was closing the door when she saw Carisi walking down the hall so waited on him instead. “What is he ordering?” Rollins asked as both her and Carisi set a bottle of wine next to Liv’s on the counter. “Italian I think. They figured it was easiest since the restaurant did family style to go and most people like Italian.” Liv replied. “Food should be here in twenty minutes.” Barba announced as he returned from the study. “I got it.” Rollins said at the knock on the door. Fin added a bottle of scotch to the counter eliciting a “bless you” from Barba. “So where’s this baby I still can’t believe Barba created?” Fin asked. “I take back my previous statement.” Barba quipped, rolling his eyes as he opened the scotch. “With Lydia, in the bedroom. They should be out shortly.” Liv answered, opening the bottle of wine she brought and pouring three glasses, while Barba poured both Fin and Carisi a glass of scotch.

“Oooh me first.” Carisi grinned as Lydia emerged with Evelyn. She smiled as he set his glass down, carefully taking the baby. “I never figured you for a baby person.” Lydia chuckled. “Are you kidding me? I come from a large Italian family, do you know how many babies I’ve held?” Carisi replied as Evelyn looked up at him. “He’s actually really good with kids, you should see him with Jesse.” Rollins added. “How often do you and Jesse hang out with Carisi?” Lydia questioned, lifting a brow, as everyone but Carisi’s attention went to Rollins as well. “She needs a male role model.” Rollins replied dismissively. Lydia gave Rollins a goofy grin when there was a knock at the door, distracting the others. Rollins rolled her eyes and offered to help with the food that had arrived.

“Are you ready to come back to work?” Liv asked Barba as they sat around the table to eat. “Yes and no. I’m ready to get back to work but I’m going to miss being at home with them.” Barba said as he looked toward Lydia and Evelyn. “It must have been nice to be able to take the month off.” Carisi stated. “It’s not like I haven’t put in to overtime.” Barba smirked. “We’re definitely excited to have you back.” Fin added. “My replacement that good huh?” Barba joked. “You have no idea...” Rollins sighed, rolling her eyes. “How much longer do you have before you start working?” Fin asked Lydia. “Two more months. That reminds me, can you two ask your nannies if they know of anyone looking for a job that they’d recommend. I’m going to start interviewing this month but I know Lucy’s great and Amanda, you always speak highly of yours so their opinion would mean a lot.” Lydia asked Liv and Rollins. “That shouldn’t be a problem. Lucy mentioned one of her friends was looking the other day.” Liv replied. “I’ll ask.” Rollins nodded.

After dinner, everyone was still sitting around the table chatting, Barba had Evelyn leaned against his chest. “She probably needs a diaper change and then a bottle.” Lydia said as she started to get up. “I got it.” Barba smiled motioning for her to sit back down. “Now this I have to see.” Rollins chuckled. “You want to see me change her diaper?” Barba questioned. “I just can’t picture it.” Rollins smirked. “Well I can assure you I can.” He replied rolling his eyes as he made his way to the bedroom where the changing table was. Lydia chuckled as she got a bottle ready for when he returned.

Barba put Evelyn in her swing when she fell asleep after her bottle. “What’s that?” Lydia asked when he pulled a box out of a kitchen cabinet. “I thought since your birthday was yesterday we could celebrate tonight with cake.” Barba smiled as he pulled a round cake out of the box, setting it on the table. “You’re not planning on putting candles on that are you?” Lydia questioned. “No.” He smirked. “Good.” She huffed. Lydia didn’t mind her birthday and she had been disappointed she had been too tired to get a cake on her actual birthday but she really hated being the center of attention. “You not want cake?” Carisi asked. “Cake is great. I just don’t want everyone to sing or have to blow out candles.” She smiled. “How old are you?” Rollins asked. “Twenty eight.” Lydia replied. Rollins smirked as she looked from Lydia to Barba who was cutting the cake. “And how old are you Barba?” She chuckled. “Forty one, but if you want any cake I suggest you don’t giggle.” He smirked. Rollins was quiet but continued to smile as he handed her a slice.


	18. Chapter 18

Lydia watched Barba as she folded laundry while sitting in the floor in front of the coffee table. He had Evelyn rested against his chest, humming softly as she fell asleep. She watched as he carefully stood, in an attempt not to wake the small baby, and disappeared into their room to put Evelyn in her bed next to theirs. “You’re getting good at that.” Lydia chuckled when he returned and sat next to her to help fold the huge pile of tiny clothes she still had left to get through. “Putting her to sleep? She falls asleep easily.” Barba replied dismissively. “Maybe for you... but I meant transferring her from your arms to the bed without waking her.” She smiled. “Now that takes talent.” He smirked. “Did you ever think your coffee table would be covered in tiny pink and purple clothing?” Lydia chuckled. Not so much at the man she currently sat next to but at the memory of the Barba she met, and thought she hated, a little over a year ago. “Not before you told me you were pregnant.” Barba smiled. “Yes because that went over so well.” She laughed. “Never going to let that go are you?” He chuckled. “What fun would that be.” Lydia smiled.

“Are you excited for tomorrow?” Barba asked, helping her put Evelyn’s clothes away in her room. “More like anxious.” Lydia sighed. “I thought you were really excited to start this job?” He asked. “I am. I just hate being the newbie, learning the ins and outs of a new work environment. That couple with leaving Evelyn for the first time in three and a half months is making me more nervous than I should be.” She replied, moving to the closet to hang a few items. “You’ve spent the last two months with Jenny, you know she’s great with Evelyn.” He assured her. “Yes, and Evelyn knows her and is comfortable with her which was the whole point of having her around before I started work but it still bothers me that I wont be there.” Lydia huffed. “You know you don’t have to work yet, if you don’t want to.” Barba offered. “And be completely dependent on you? I don’t think so.” She smirked. “I didn’t mean forever, just until you’re ready.” He said, rolling his eyes. “A job opportunity like this doesn’t come around very often. I can’t just turn it down the day before I start. How irresponsible would that be? Besides I want this job, I’ve worked my whole life for this job and I’m looking forward to getting out of the house a bit. I am allowed to have mixed feelings with everything that’s happened in the last year.” Lydia sighed again. “You don’t regret anything?” Barba asked softly, watching her as she put sheets and towels away in the dresser. Lydia shook her head gently as she put the last of the items in the drawer before making her way to stand in front of him. “I have a mixture of feelings, anxiety, fear, happiness, guilt, hope, joy, a little self doubt... but I can assure you none of those feeling have ever been regret.” She smiled, pushing up to kiss him.

“You look fantastic!” Barba said as Lydia got dressed. “It’s not too much?” She asked, questioning the dress choice while looking in the full length mirror. “Don’t be nervous. You’ll do great and you look perfect. I promise it’s not too much.” He smiled moving to stand behind her. “Well we definitely look like we belong together.” She chuckled, smiling at their reflection in the mirror. “See perfect.” He smirked, leaning down to kiss her. “Are you going to be late Friday?” Lydia asked while putting on her earrings. “I shouldn’t be, why?” He asked. “I have a surprise so if Liv calls do me a favor and don’t answer.” Lydia grinned, knowing there was no way he would actually ignore work. “I don’t like surprises.” He huffed. “Too bad.” She said, her grin growing larger as she went to let Jenny, their nanny, in.

“Are you still at work?” Lydia texted as she scooped Evelyn up after her first week at her new job. “I’m at the precinct.” Barba sent back. “I told you to ignore Liv’s call.” She replied. “You knew that wouldn’t happen.” He texted. “Are you going to be there long?” She asked. “Maybe another hour.” He replied. “Good. Don’t leave. I’ll meet you there at six thirty.” Lydia sent back before opening the door for Lucia. “Hi Lucia, thank you so much for doing this.” Lydia smiled. “You act like watching my nieta is an inconvenience.” Lucia muttered dismissively taking Evelyn from her. “I can still thank you for doing something even if you enjoy it, though you might be singing a different tune in the morning.” Lydia chuckled. “Please, Rafael was a stubborn baby. He refused to sleep, like he thought he was missing out on the world if he did... and so demanding. If I could handle him, I can handle his daughter for one night.” Lucia laughed. “At least now I know where she gets it from.” Lydia chuckled. “I wouldn’t be so quick to put all the blame on him, I’m pretty sure you’re fairly stubborn too.” Lucia smirked. “Yeah well he can’t prove I was a difficult baby but you just confirmed he was.” Lydia smiled. 

“Lydia, how was the first week at the new job?” Rollins asked when she saw her enter the bullpen. “Actually really good. The hours are great and I have the freedom to schedule a break if I want to run home and see Evelyn. I had forgotten how much I enjoy helping people work through things. It’s different than doing rape crisis counseling, though that does come up, there’s a bit more of a variety.” Lydia smiled, as she sat in the desk across from Rollins after noticing Barba was, very animatedly, talking in Liv’s office. “What, you just sit in whoever’s chair you want now?” Carisi asked as he and Fin approached them. Lydia actually looked at the desk that used to be hers for the first time, noticing all Carisi’s things had been moved to it. “Like you care if I sit at your desk.” She smirked standing to give them both a hug. “I kind of hate that you can’t tell you delivered a baby less than four months ago.” Rollins huffed, leaning back in her chair. “No one can tell you’ve given birth.” Lydia countered. “Yes but it took me almost a year to get back to where I was before Jessie was born. It’s been less than four months and I swear you look better.” Rollins smirked. “I can promise you I don’t.” Lydia chuckled. “I take it we’re not getting our warrant?” Fin interjected, gesturing towards Liv’s office. “We really didn’t have much for him to work with.” Rollins shrugged.

“Alright, we’ll see if we can find more evidence without it.” Liv sighed as she and Barba exited her office. Lydia smiled and made her way to Barba as they moved further into the bullpen. “Lydia, hi.” Liv greeted. “Hey Liv.” She smiled. “Where’s Evelyn?” Barba asked, knowing that Jenny would be long gone for the day. “At the apartment.” Lydia smiled. “By herself?” He fretted. “Yes, I left our soon to be four month old alone to fend for herself.” Lydia said sarcastically. “Ok, that was a stupid question, who’s with her?” Barba asked. “You’re mother.” She smirked. “Why?” He questioned. “So that we can go eat dinner somewhere without having to stop eating every two seconds.” Lydia smiled. “Is this my surprise?” Barba smirked. “Part of it.” She teased, kissing him. “Geez, get a room.” Rollins taunted from her desk. “We have one and if any of you call for anything less than life or death I will hunt you down and hurt you.” Lydia said playfully as she turned to Liv and the detectives. “I really didn’t need to know that...” Carisi muttered as he sat at his desk. “Thank your girlfriend then.” Lydia teased. “We’re not... there’s nothing... we’re friends.” Carisi rambled. “That’s convincing.” Lydia chuckled. “I really miss you around here.” Fin smiled as Rollins shook her head.

“I can’t believe we have a night to ourselves.” Barba smiled as he slipped out of his work clothes at the hotel. “A whole night, uninterrupted.” Lydia smirked, turning so he could unzip her dress. “No ear piercing screams at various intervals throughout the night...” He hummed as she backed him toward the bed. “No middle of the night feedings.” She smiled, pressing her lips to his before pulling his undershirt off. “Not waking up for no reason except to check that she’s still breathing.” He whispered against her ear as he unhooked her bra. “No fear of waking anyone when getting out of bed to pee.” Lydia chuckled, slipping out of her own underwear before removing his. “What are we going to do with this wonderfully free night.” Barba smiled, crawling in bed next to her. “Well I was kind of thinking...” Lydia said teasingly as she kissed him. “Yes.” He hummed, pulling her closer to him. “That we could...” She whispered, her lips planting kisses on his neck. “Uh huh.” He muttered. “Sleep.” She grinned as she pulled back to look at him. “Thank god...” he sighed, “I would do the other if you wanted but I’m so tired...” “You and me both.” Lydia chuckled, curling into his arms, both of them falling asleep in a matter of minutes.


	19. Chapter 19

“Have you guys been here long?” Lydia asked as she joined Barba and the others at the bar they liked to frequent. “Maybe twenty minutes.” Barba smiled giving her a quick peck as she sat down. “So I take it court went well?” She asked, noticing everyone seemed to be in good spirits. “ It did. Jury came back with a guilty verdict in less than an hour.” Carisi said. “Does that mean you will all have an actual weekend off?” Lydia chuckled. For the last few months it seemed that SVU had been hit with case after case and almost all of them going to trial, keeping Barba away from her and Evelyn more than either of them would have liked. “Even if we do get another case we can let you have the weekend. There are other ADA’s.” Liv smiled. “Yeah but they’re not half as good.” Rollins muttered. “I’m only saying if something comes up this weekend.” Liv countered. “Lets just hope we all get a weekend off.” Fin interjected. 

The group chatted for two more rounds before getting their tabs to leave. “You’ve been living with Barba for what, a year now?” Rollins asked as they stood to leave. “Yeah, why?” Lydia questioned. “I was just kind of curious if you two bickered as much at home as you did when you worked together.” Rollins chuckled. “Oddly enough, we don’t. Living with him is extremely easy and we are way more similar than I originally thought.” Lydia smiled. “Well that’s slightly disappointing.” Rollins smirked. 

“Hi Lydia, Mr. Barba.” Jenny said, handing him Evelyn when they entered their apartment. “How was she today?” Lydia smiled. “She was fantastic. She hasn’t had dinner yet, but ate a couple slices of avocado with her baby food at lunch, took two really good naps, and has crawled around your entire living room.” Jenny chuckled. “So she should be good and tired at bed time.” Lydia grinned, kissing Evelyn on the cheek as Rafael pretended to eat her neck, getting a giggle out of her. “I’ll see you on Monday.” Jenny said, grabbing her things to leave. 

Lydia locked the door behind her. “Do you think she’d call us Mr. and Mrs. Barba if we were married?” Barba smirked. “She calls me Lydia because I asked her to. She calls you Mr. Barba because you intimidate her.” Lydia chuckled, gathering something to feed Evelyn. “Good.” He smiled, setting Evelyn in her high chair. “You like that you make her nervous?” Lydia asked, shaking her head. “I like that she knows I can put her in jail if she does anything to my daughter.” He smiled. “I hadn’t really thought about how intimidating it must be to be the nanny to a prosecutor...” Lydia thought out loud. “You know I only mean if she did something on purpose, not if Evelyn falls from the monkey bars and breaks her arm or something when she’s older.” Barba said. “I know.” She chuckled, kissing him on her way to feed their daughter.

“Is she asleep?” Lydia asked when he cuddled next to her on the couch. “She is.” Barba smirked, pulling her to his lips. Lydia returned the kiss, pulling herself onto his lap, straddling him, his hands running up her sides and under the thin material of his worn out Harvard t-shirt she had found and took upon herself to start sleeping in. Her fingers knotted into his hair as she pushed herself against his groin. “Do we still have condoms?” She panted as Barba lifted the shirt over her head, his tongue finding her nipple. “In my nightstand.” He replied, his attention not leaving her breast. Lydia paused her movements, causing him to look up at her. “What?” “Evelyn just went to sleep.” Lydia sighed. She slept through most of the night but they didn’t dare go in their bedroom until they knew she was in a good sleep, having woken her up simply walking passed her it seemed. “That’s ok.” Barba smiled, flipping her beneath him on the couch and kissing down her torso, tugging her pajama pants down as he went. “Rafael.” She giggled quietly. “You might want to use the pillow to muffle yourself.” He smirked, looking up at her from between her legs. Lydia rolled her eyes but grabbed the pillow, covering her face when her back started to arch, pressing the pillow harder against her when her hips bucked.

Barba kissed his way back up her once she had finished, finding her lips again and he laid on top of her. “Fuck it.” Lydia panted, pushing his pajama’s down and freeing him, her legs spread on either side of his waist. “Are you sure?” He breathed, his kisses moving to her neck as he teased her opening. “No.” She chuckled, pulling him back to her lips while lifting her hips so his head pushed inside her. “You can’t say no and then do that.” Barba stated, pausing to look at her. “Just fuck me Raf.” Lydia smiled, pulling him back to her lips as he pressed fully into her. “Fine.” He chuckled and began moving inside her, kissing her to muffle her moans. Lydia lifted to meet each thrust, her fingers reaching into his hair, enjoying the throaty groans he made against her lips. “Fuck.”She panted, keeping her voice low, his lips parting from hers as his forehead pressed into the couch cushion next to her, thrusting, waiting for her. Lydia wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulder, biting gently on his shoulder to stifle her moans as she came undone beneath him. Barba pumped a few more times before his body stiffened and his lips returned to hers, his weight fully pressed against her. 

“I love you.” He breathed, lifting his head to look at her. “Let’s get married.” Lydia smiled, running her fingers through his hair. “Is that just the afterglow?” Barba smirked. “No, I’m serious.” She grinned. “You said you wanted to wait.” He said, furrowing his brow. “I changed my mind.” Lydia shrugged, a twinkle in her eye as she cupped his cheek. “So you don’t want to wait?” He asked, still trying to wrap his head around her change of heart. “Marry me, Raf.” She said, gently biting her lower lip, waiting for his response. “I can’t believe you’re proposing to me.” Barba mused, shaking his head slightly. “So...?” Lydia prodded. “Are you sure?” He questioned. “More than I’ve been of anything.” She smiled. “So it is the afterglow.” Barba smirked as he sat up, tossing his old Harvard shirt at her and readjusted his pajama pants.

“You haven’t answered me.” Lydia chuckled when he pulled her from the couch before she had time to put anything besides the shirt back on. Barba held her hand as they entered the home office, only letting go to enter the combination to the large safe mounted in the closet behind his desk. “You have a safe?” Lydia asked, lifting an eyebrow. “Mostly for sensitive documents or cases I might be working. I did put Evelyn and your social and birth certificates in the binder with mine.” He smiled. “So no bars of gold hidden away.” She chuckled. Barba smiled and shook his head, pulling the heavy door open and reaching towards the back of the safe. “Are you going to answer me?” Lydia asked, her voice wavering slightly. She had thought he’d say yes immediately, he brought the subject of marriage up enough. “Yes.” Barba smiled turning to face her. “Yes you’ll marry me or yes you’ll answer my question?” Lydia all but muttered. “Yes, I’ll marry you.” He smirked, handing her a small wooden jewelry box with the name of the jeweler engraved on it. “How long have you had a ring?” She asked, clearly amused despite the fact the she hadn’t opened the box to confirm what was inside. “I bought it about a month before Evelyn was born. When you were stuck on bed rest and tolerating my mother extraordinarily well.” Barba smiled. “You’re absolutely crazy.” Lydia said, giving him a pointed look, but finally opening the box he had handed her.

“You seem to wear more silver than gold so I went with white gold and wanted to keep the style simple, because that seemed to fit you...” Lydia covered his mouth with her fingers to stop the sudden onset of nervous rambling he has succumbed to. “It’s beautiful.” She smiled. “You like the round cut?” He asked, taking it out of the box and sliding it on her finger. “I do.” Lydia smiled, pushing her fingers into his hair and pressing her lips to his. Barba walked her backwards lifting her once they reached his desk. His hands only left her long enough to push his pants down so he could enter her as she sat on the edge of his desk, her legs wrapped around his waist. “Jesus, Raf...” Lydia panted, her head tilting back, exposing her neck to him as he thrust into her. He continued his movements, his mouth on her neck, kissing her back up to her lips. One hand holding her head so she’d look at him instead of the ceiling as she climaxed, holding her tightly, giving into his own release. “Now to just convince you to take my name.” He panted, his arms still holding her tightly, only partially to keep himself standing. “Maybe I’ll hyphenate.” Lydia smiled. “You’re making all sorts of concessions tonight.” Barba chuckled. “I don’t consider agreeing to marry you a concession,” She smirked, “I love you.” “I love you too.” He smiled, kissing her quickly and then helping her off the desk so they could go to bed.

“Have you thought about when you want to get married?” Barba asked as he picked Lydia’s pajama pants and underwear up off the couch as she fed Evelyn breakfast. “What about April?” She questioned, spooning egg on the tray so Evelyn could feed herself. Most of it would end up on the floor, but she had stopped allowing anyone to feed it to her, wanting to do it herself. “That’s three months away.” He informed her as though she didn’t now how a calendar worked. “Really?” She replied sarcastically. “I just thought it took a while to plan a wedding.” Barba stated. “I don’t want anything big. Maybe we just do it here and invite your mom and SVU.” Lydia shrugged. “That’s all you want to invite?” He questioned. “I don’t have any family. My paternal and maternal grandparents died when I was young and both my parents were an only child, as was I. I could invite friends from school but then the list would just keep growing. I’d rather keep it simple.” She shrugged again. “Do you want anything traditional?” He teased. “I want a pretty dress and a pretty cake,” Lydia grinned, “You wouldn’t happen to know a judge who could officiate?” “I could make a few calls.” He smirked. “Good.” She smiled. “You better start looking if you want a dress for three months out.” Barba chuckled. “I’ve already called Amanda and made an appointment with a little boutique on forty fifth. Can you watch Evelyn for a bit?” She asked. “I can. How’d Amanda react?” He smirked. “I didn’t tell her yet, just asked her to lunch and if she wanted to go shopping.” Lydia grinned as he shook his head.

“Why are you walking so fast?” Rollins grumbled, following quickly behind Lydia. Their lunch had ran long and they were due at the bridal shop in five minutes. “I’m just excited.” Lydia smiled, turning the corner on forty fifth. “You’re excited to shop?” Rollins asked, furrowing her brow, “where are we going anyway?” They weren’t exactly passing a lot of clothing stores. “Here.” Lydia said, abruptly stopping in front of the door with wedding dresses in the windows on either side of it. “A bridal shop?” Rollins questioned, quickly snatching Lydia’s left hand. “Are you sure?” Rollins teased, “I mean it’s Barba.” “Just shut up and help me pick out a dress.” Lydia chuckled.


	20. Chapter 20

Barba was playing with Evelyn on the floor, reading one of the hard baby books to her as she completely ignored him, and instead kept trying to crawl farther than he could reach. Finally, he scooped her into his lap and held her so he could continue with the book. Lydia was watching them over the top of the book she was attempting to read on the couch, a rare early evening for Barba. “What’s today?” Lydia asked, suddenly feeling a little off. “Friday.” Barba replied, barely stopping his reading. “No, the date.” She clarified. “February twentieth.” He replied, lowering the book to look at her. “Shit...” Lydia grumbled, hopping off the couch and grabbing her jacket and purse. “Where are you going?” Barba called after her, but she was out the door before she could answer. He furrowed his brow, but continued reading to Evelyn, who seemed to be enjoying his take on the animal sounds.

“What’s the matter?” He asked when Lydia returned less than twenty minutes later. He had stopped reading and moved on to following Evelyn around the apartment as she crawled. “I haven’t had my period.” She muttered. “This month?” He asked, slightly distracted by his daughter and not picking up on the implication. “Since New Years.” Lydia stated, pulling the pregnancy test from the bag. “You’re pregnant!” He blurted. “I honestly don’t know. I used to never be late, but after Evelyn my cycle has been... weird.” Lydia sighed. “Weird?” He smirked. “Inconsistent.” She smiled, rolling her eyes. “So you’re not pregnant?” He asked lifting Evelyn up and carrying her to Lydia. “I don’t know, that’s why I bought a pregnancy test.” She replied, tapping it against his chest as she made her way to the bathroom. 

“Have we... without?” He asked following her. “The night I proposed. Twice I believe.” She smirked at him while fiddling with the packaging. “You know considering I already had the ring and you knew I wanted to marry you, I don’t think you should get to take credit for that.” Barba grumbled. “Too bad.” Lydia grinned, giving him a quick kiss once she finally got the test free. “How long does it take?” He asked. “Barba, I’m going to pee now.” She huffed, folding her arms as she waited for him to leave. “I’ve seen you give birth, I’m pretty sure you can pee in front of me.” Barba smirked. “Fine.” She grumbled, rolling her eyes.

“So... how long does it take?” He asked as she set it on the counter. “Three minutes.” Lydia replied, staring at the flashing blocks working their way across the tiny screen. “What do you want it to say?” He asked. “What?” She questioned, looking up at him. “Do you want to be pregnant or not?” He restated. “You’re fairly calm.” She smirked. “We make cute babies.” Barba smiled, raising the pitch of his voice a bit as he made Evelyn giggle. “You want another one?” Lydia asked, lifting a brow. Barba glanced at the result and smiled, “I asked what you wanted.” “I really don’t want her to be an only child.” She sighed. “Good, because you’re pregnant.” He stated, gesturing to the test. “Jesus, you’re fertile.” She muttered. “Why would you say that?” He chuckled. “We’ve had sex twice without protection and both times you’ve knocked me up.” Lydia replied. “I’m pretty sure we’ve had more sex without protection than with.” Barba chuckled again. “Yes, but only because I’ve was already pregnant,” she smiled while rolling her eyes, “we’ve been pretty careful other than that.” “This is true...” He nodded. “You took the news much better this time.” Lydia grinned. “It’s a little different this time.” Barba smirked. “How so?” She questioned. “Well, first of all we’ve been through this once,” he smiled, handing Evelyn to her, “second we’ve been together longer than a month and a half, and third you’ve agreed to marry me.” “I think you’ve agreed to marry me.” Lydia grinned even larger, following him out of the bathroom.

The dress was a sleek ivory satin, 1950’s vintage style, sleeveless with a tea length A line skirt and bateau neck. It had been a little large in the store but considering her timeline it had fit pretty well. “Did you purposefully put on weight to make this fit better?” Rollins chuckled as she zipped the dress up. Lydia wasn’t showing yet, but she was definitely filling out faster with the second pregnancy. “No.” Lydia smiled. “Are you sure this is what you want?” Rollins asked as she watched Lydia finalize her hair and jewelry. “Will you stop questioning my decision to marry Barba.” Lydia chuckled. “I meant the small wedding.” Rollins clarified. “I hate being the center of attention. I would have just invited you and Liv if I didn’t think it would be rude not to include Carisi and Fin. That doesn’t mean I don’t want them here... I’d just prefer even less people to stand in front of.” Lydia smiled, her nerves showing for the first time. “Your stage fright is really bad, huh?” Rollins said. “It is.” Lydia sighed. “What’s Barba wearing?” Rollins asked to change the subject and help relax her a bit. “My favorite suit, the light grey one with a white shirt and a lilac tie and matching pocket square I bought him... I can’t wait to take it off him.” Lydia smiled. “Ok seriously... I don’t need that mental image.” Rollins groaned. “Sorry,” Lydia smirked, “honestly I prefer to leave the suits on him anyway.” “I will stop helping you get ready.” Rollins threatened. “I’m done now anyway.” Lydia grinned.

“You look pretty.” Rafael smiled when Lydia and Rollins joined the others in the living room. “I told you I wanted a pretty dress.” Lydia smiled. “The cakes pretty too.” He smirked. “Shut up.” She huffed, smacking him. “Are you two ready?” Judge Barth asked from across the room. “Are you?” Barba smiled. “I am.” Lydia smirked, following him to the space by the windows, the spot where they shared their first kiss, though that tiny tidbit was just for them. The view really was beautiful from there. “We’re ready Elena.” Barba smiled. “Elena?” Carisi questioned as he started to find a seat. “My first name.” Judge Barth replied. “Oh, can everybody remain standing? I promise this will be quick.” Lydia said when she noticed the small group looking for somewhere to sit. Somehow everyone sitting and staring at them made her feel more nervous than them standing around the space they were in. “It really will be quick. They only want me to say what I’m legally required to say.” Judge Barth stated.

Less than five minutes later Judge Barth had finished and Lucia was forcing them to cut the cake, something Lydia had hoped to avoid. Thankfully no one asked them to feed each other, it’s not that she didn’t trust Barba to not smear cake across her face, just that she found the tradition somewhat strange. Maybe she just didn’t know the meaning behind it. Lucia was finishing up cutting slices for everyone while Lydia joined Rollins on the floor to play with Noah, Jesse, and Evelyn. “I’ll get the champagne.” Liv smiled, grabbing a bottle out of the fridge. “Sparkling grape juice for Lydia.” Barba whispered, smiling at the face Liv made. They were going to tell everyone once they got a chance to tell Lucia first. “She’s pregnant?” Liv asked, her voice low but not hiding the fact that she was surprised. “Who’s pregnant?” Carisi asked, while munching on cheese and crackers not far from them. He had been loud enough to draw everyone in the rooms attention to him, including Lucia who was frozen midway through slicing a piece of cake. “What?” Carisi shrugged still not aware of the fact that he had basically told everyone Lydia was pregnant. 

Lydia rolled her eyes and smiled at Barba as she passed Evelyn off to Rollins. Quickly she made her way to Evelyns room and returned with a little yellow gift bag. “We were going to give you this after everyone left, but given Carisi can’t take a hint...” Lydia smiled and handed Lucia the yellow gift bag. Lucia carefully pulled out a four by six sized wooded frame with nietos written in the scroll work around the edges. In place of a picture was a white slip of paper with the words, Yes, plural! and an arrow pointing to nietos in the frame. Under that in smaller type it said, picture available sometime around October 5th. “Jesus... is that all you two do?” Rollins teased as Lucia went to hug Barba. Lydia rolled her eyes and joined her husband and mother in law in the kitchen, Lucia pulling her into a hug when she got close enough.

“So this was a shotgun wedding?” Fin teased. “Funny enough, no. We conceived either right before or right after I proposed.” Lydia said smiling when Barba rolled his eyes. Knowing it was because she had yet again taken credit for the proposal, not that she had over shared details of their sex life. Though the groan from Rollins was for the latter. “It says nietos not nietas... that’s because you don’t know the gender?” Lucia asked. She assumed it was too soon to tell from an ultrasound, and with the fact that Barba had waited so long last time she didn’t want to get her hopes up, but she did know they could tell the gender from a blood test. “I went the opposite route this time and we had the blood test done.” Barba smiled. “Well, is it a girl or boy?” Carisi asked when no one said anything and Lucia hugged Barba again. Fin rolled his eyes as Lydia answered Carisi. “A boy.”

“Have you picked a name?” Rollins asked, handing Lydia Evelyn and leaning to scoop up her own daughter who had followed her. “You know, I was thinking we could name him after his dad, Rafael Barba Jr., then there really would be two of them.” Lydia chuckled. “I still think that’s a scary thought.” Rollins smirked. “We haven’t decided on a name yet.” Barba interjected, having all but vetoed having a namesake when Lydia teased they could call him Little Rafi. “Any ideas?” Liv asked as she started passing out the champagne. “I like Julian.” Barba smiled, not noticing the scrunched up face Lydia made that cause Rollins to giggle. “And I like James.” Lydia added, smirking when Barba rolled his eyes. “We have agreed that Aaron would make a nice middle name,” Barba shrugged, “we’ve got some time to figure out the first name.”


	21. Chapter 21

Lydia was dancing around the living room with Evelyn who was going through a phase of constantly demanding attention... not that they minded. She had found a youtube channel that played children’s music, mostly nursery rhymes, with little cartoons to go along with them. It was the only way either of them could get anything done around the house without Evelyn babbling extremely loudly, often confused for screaming, to be picked up or played with. As a result, both her and Barba had learned, and in some cases relearned the songs well enough to sing them without the videos on at all.

“Skidamarink a dink a dink, skinamarink a doo, I love you.” Lydia sang, spinning Evelyn around, “Skidamarink a dink a dink, skinamarink a doo, I love you.”

She didn’t notice Barba had entered the apartment until he joined in, wrapping his arms around both Lydia and his daughter. “I love you in the morning, and in the afternoon. I love you in the evening and underneath the moon... Oh, Skidamarink a dink a dink, skinamarink a doo, I love you.“

“You know,” Lydia chuckled, handing Evelyn who was squirming to get into his arms over to him, “you have a very pleasant singing voice.”

“Sure.” He smirked.

“I’m serious... in a different life you could have made a career out of it.”

Barba rolled his eyes and kissed her, before lifting Evelyn high above his head making her squeal and giggle.

“Oh, before I forget. I have a work event we need to attend.” Barba said, pulling Evelyn back to his chest.

“Work event?”

“A charity fundraiser for a law foundation that the DA’s office has ties with.”

“I assume I need a gown...” Lydia sighed, resting her hand on the bump she knew would make dress shopping more difficult than it should be. “When is it?”

“July twentieth. I already asked my mom to come over and watch Evelyn while we’re out.”

 

The dress had taken the better part of a month to find. She had wanted one that she clearly looked pregnant in and not just like she hadn’t lost the baby weight from their first kid... not that she had met any of these people for them to know she had recently had a kid. She found it somewhat ironic that out of all the time she spent in his office, the only people she had met were Carmen and the people she worked with at SVU.

She quickly checked the dress in the mirror, smoothing out the lines of the full length mauve colored skirt and adjusting the high neck cream bodice. Originally it had had a bow prominently place right above her belly, something that would scream baby to anyone she passed. And while she wanted to look pregnant, the bow was a bit much and she’d had the dress altered so that only a simple band in mauve separated the bodice and skirt.

“Lucia,” Lydia called as she exited the bedroom, “did you need anything before I go?”

“No sweetheart. Go, have fun. And tell my son he works too much.” Lucia smiled as she bounced Evelyn on her knee.

“Bye tiny.” Lydia smiled, leaning over to give Evelyn one last kiss on the cheek and then changed her mind, picking her up for a good hug and multiple kisses on her cheek.

“You’re going to be late.” Lucia chuckled.

“I’m going.” Lydia handed Evelyn back, grabbed her purse and Barba’s tux, and headed down to the car that was waiting for her.

 

When she entered the bullpen, she saw Barba and Liv talking in her office.

“You look nice.” Carisi said.

“Thanks.” Lydia called as she quickly passed him. “Here,” she said shoving the bag with Barba’s tux toward him, “hey Liv.”

“Lydia.” Liv greeted.

“I still need a few minutes.” Barba sighed.

“That’s fine, it’s not my work thing... I’ll bug Rollins.” She shrugged.

Lydia leaned against Rollins desk, patiently waiting for her husband as Rollins stared at her stomach for a moment before speaking.

“How is he?”

“What?” Lydia furrowed her brow, moving to sit in the chair next to Rollins desk.

“I was just curious... I mean this is your second pregnancy in as many years and... forget I asked.”

“You’re asking how Rafael is in bed?” Lydia chuckled.

“Never mind... I don’t want to know.” Rollins grumbled, regretting bringing it up at all.

“It’s the best sex I’ve ever had.”

“That can’t be right...”

“But it is.” Lydia smiled, watching Barba exit Liv’s office to go change in the stations locker rooms.

“Barba?” Rollins reiterated in disbelief.

“Barba.” Lydia chuckled.

“But that’s because you love him or something?”

“No. It was pretty fantastic the first time we slept together and I’m almost positive I told him I hated him right before. And while I may not have actually hated him, I definitely didn’t love him yet. That came later.” Lydia smiled.

“You ready?” Barba asked, wrapping his arm around Lydia as he joined her at Rollins desk.

“Whenever you are.” Lydia grinned, but mostly at the face Rollins had made as she shook away the mental image she could only blame herself for.

 

The ballroom was filled with tables lined up the length of it, all arranged so the audience only had to turn slightly to see the speakers. Barba guided her to a table near the front but slightly off to one side that was already filled with the exception of the two seats reserved for them.

“Sorry we’re late, SVU picked up a suspect on a case they’ve been working.” Barba said as he pulled Lydia’s chair out, allowing her to sit before taking his own seat.

“You brought a date.” This was from a woman sitting across from them at the table, her eyes lingering on the bit of Lydia’s stomach you could still see despite the table.

“This is my wife, Dr. Lydia Coleman-Barba,” Barba smiled, taking the time to introduce Lydia to Jack McCoy, his fellow ADA’s, and the spouses or dates he knew the names of.

“You’re married?” Angela Brooks, the woman who had spoke previously half blurted, quickly adjusting herself so she appeared less surprised.

“Three months now.” Lydia smiled.

“And you’re having a baby?” Brooks asked.

“Baby number two.” Barba grinned.

He was private at work, SVU dragging him out of his office almost as much as he was in it. He talked to the other ADA’s but always about cases. It wasn’t that he was hiding his personal life, just that it had never come up in conversation and unlike with SVU, no one at his office actually knew Lydia.

“I feel like I don’t even know who you are now.” Cutter chuckled. He was sitting with his wife a few seats down from Brooks.

“Me either...” Brooks said trying to sound playful, but it came out with a small sigh and she looked a bit crestfallen. She again altered her facial expression and smiled, though not quick enough to prevent Lydia from noticing.

Barba chuckled. “I don’t see how my marital status changes who I am.”

“It doesn’t, it’s just unexpected. Did you invite anyone from the DA’s office to your wedding?” Cutter asked.

“That’s my fault,” Lydia answered, “I get queasy and begin to panic in front of large groups of people. We had an extremely small ceremony at home.”

“How’d you two meet?” Cutter’s wife, Elizabeth, asked.

“Lydia volunteered as a victim advocate with SVU while she was working on her doctorate.” Rafael replied.

“Oh, what’s your doctorate in?” Elizabeth smiled.

“Psychology.” Lydia answered.

“SVU doesn’t call you for psych evals do they?” McCoy asked lifting a brow.

“No, thank god. I hope to never have to testify again...” Lydia grumbled.

“Again?” McCoy narrowed his eyes at Barba.

“It was a while ago.” Barba stated, gently nudging Lydia under the table in hopes she’d keep her mouth shut about the fact that they were already dating.

“You guys must have worked together a bit before you started dating then.” Brooks said.

“We did. I thought he was an narcissistic ass.” Lydia chuckled.

“That sounds about right.” Cutter chimed in, chuckling with her as Barba rolled his eyes.

“You did not. You said my confidence bordered on narcissistic, you never called me an ass.”

“I literally labeled you in my phone as jackass.” Lydia smirked.

“That’s right... you did.” Barba had completely forgotten about that.

“How did the two of you start dating then?” Elizabeth asked, not hiding her amusement at the exchange they had just shared.

“He tricked me into coming to his apartment.”

“I didn’t trick you, I needed a file and you left after I had already headed home from work.”

“You told Liv for me not to rush and left your home address.”

“Nothing stopped you from bringing it by my office before five thirty.” Barba smirked.

“Did you really ask me to bring that file just to get me alone?”

“No,” Barba chuckled, “I wanted to get home before dark for once and needed the file. Once you were there I thought offering you a drink couldn’t hurt.” He smiled and gave her a cute little shrug.

“Ass.” Lydia grinned.

 

Evelyn was asleep in her crib when they finally got home and Barba had insisted that Lucia let his car service take her home due to the hour.

“How well do you know ADA Brooks?” Lydia asked as she removed her jewelry.

“She works on the same floor as me and pops in to ask for my opinion occasionally. Why?”

“She just seemed a bit disappointed you were off the market.”

Barba moved behind her to unzip her dress. “And you wanted to know if there was some history there?”

“There’s not?”

“Not that I’m aware of.”

“She’s pretty.”

“You thinking about us taking on a second wife?” He teased as she crawled in bed.

“I think I’ll change your name back to jackass in my phone.” Lydia huffed, cuddling closer to him when he joined her in bed.

“If Brooks was interested in me I was unaware and it was one sided.” He chuckled.

“I can’t fault her for finding you attractive.”

“That’s because I tricked you into falling in love with me.” Barba smirked.

“Don’t give yourself that much credit, even when I thought I hated you I found you attractive.” Lydia smiled. “It made you more irritating.”


End file.
